Happy Trails....
Well, I am officially a librarian! *throws imaginary mortarboard up in air* Yay me!
Of course, that also means that I officially start my grown up librarian job tomorrow. And that means that I am freaking out. I don't want to be a grown up anymore. I don't want to leave Madison. I don't want to leave my friends. I certainly don't want the responsibility of running a children's department. Who the hell thought I was qualified to do that!? Jesus!
Now, I could post a long diatribe filled with freaking out, weepiness and cliched sentiment. I've actually got about three posts saved on my account all about that but I'm not going to post that. Those posts are under the "Letters you write but never send because you don't want to look crazy" file. So instead, I'm going to write about my favorite method of coping: mixes. I am the queen of mixes and now that I have an iPod I can make mixes for every occasion. For example, I have a "Not corny, classic" mix with all of my favorite swinging hits from the 1960s, a mix titled "Naparu" with all of my favorite sleeping hits like "Julia" by The Beatles and a "Get Down" mix with classics like "Genius of Love" by the Tom Tom Club. There's also the therapeutic mixes like "So Long *Five Months Later Boy* including "Since U Been Gone" by Kelly Clarkson (seriously, what did scorned women do before Kelly?) and "I'm Gonna Wash That Man Right Out of My Hair" by Ella Fitzgerald. So when the freaking out started, I of course made a mix titled "So Long Farewell" (a little shout out to my girl Julie Andrews):
1) "Bye, Bye Baby (Baby Goodbye) by The Four Seasons. Sure, Frankie and the boys are saying goodbye to a girl but it works for a town too, right?
2) "Fairest of the Seasons" by Nico. I love this song, and the line "I'd be leaving in the fairest of the seasons" seems particularly pertinent since I am of course moving away from Madison during the best time to live here.
3) "Leaving on a Jet Plane" by Peter, Paul and Mary. Oh John Denver, you tug at my heart strings. And Mary? You are so perfectly mournful I want to have your babies.
4) "Mother of God" by Patty Griffin. All for one line: "So I'm wearing my footsteps into this floor. One day I won't live here anymore and someone will wonder who lived here before and went on their way."
5) "Leaving Las Vegas" by Sheryl Crow. Before the duets wtih Kid Rock and the hair dye commercials, Sheryl Crow was putting out decent albums. This one is a gimme.
6) "The Only Living Boy in New York" by Simon and Garfunkel. If I could, I would put this song on every mix that I make (wait, I do.) There's a travel theme so it was included on this one.
7) "Sloop John B" by The Beach Boys. This one talks about home. Of course, I have no clue where home actually is anymore. Well, wherever it is, "I feel so broke up, I want to go home."
8) "The Long and Winding Road" by The Beatles. Oh Paul, you're lovely. Overly sentimental and lovely.
9) "Home Life" by John Mayer. "Think I'm gonna stay home. Have myself a home life." Despite the fact that I am terrified about this grown up thing, I'm hoping that I can stay put for a while.
10) "I Must Belong Somewhere" by Bright Eyes. Generally I have no idea what Conor Oberst is talking about and I don't know if this song even relates but he says "leave" and "leaving" a lot. Meh.
11) "In My Room" by The Beach Boys. It worries me how much I relate to Brian Wilson. Sometimes I'd like to just hide out in my room too.
12) "Useless Desires" by Patty Griffin. My old roommate Krysta and I love this song. She thinks it's about suicide whereas I just think it's about a woman leaving a town or place that never really treated her that well. Either way, it is so depressing and hopeful all at the same time that I can't help but love it. Patty Griffin is a genius.
13) "Katie's Been Gone" by Bob Dylan and The Band. How could I not put this song on the mix?
14) "Moon River" by Audrey Hepburn. Audrey Hepburn's voice is so perfect for this song. I know a lot of people gave her crap for her lack of singing talent but I think it's lovely. "Two drifters off to see the world. There's such a lot of world to see." Sure, I'm only one drifter but I think it works.
15) "You Can't Always Get What You Want" by The Rolling Stones. This is another song that I will try to put on every mix I make. I love the sad beginning with the french horn and the crazy, happy, jubilant ending. A fine way to end a mix.
I've basically been listening to it non-stop and I'll be blasting it while packing up the last of my stuff so I can leave for Cedarburg tonight. I won't have internet at my apartment but I'll try my best to keep you all updated on my new chapter in my "adventures in library land" (was that too cheesy? eh. whatever.)
6 Comments:
Oh, Katie, sweetie! I'm sad you're leaving... but you also have so much to look forward to and so much to do that your sadness and missing-Madison-ness will evaporate into a frenzy of whipping-your-library department-into-shape-ness. You'll have a lot on your plate and while I know that you are afraid of officially being an adult (aren't we all, really?), I think you are going to be fabulous at it. You are going to be one of those lucky people who will age only in numbers, so fret not about being an adult.
Keep your chin up, cry a little, listen to your mix and keep on chugging (much like an Old Crow song that I'm fond of -- "Chug along, chug along, chugging right to your door" -- if you forget the sexual undertones of the song, of course!). You're going to do wonderfully!!
Congratulations Katie- I know that you will take the library world by storm. One of the best things about Youth Services jobs is that you really don't have to grow up- you have to retain your youthful joy, enthusiasm and outlooks. You are more than qualified to whip this children's department into shape!
Happy first day of work!! I hope you polished your tambourine last night :) Your Madison bitches will certainly make a road trip or two or ten to visit, and you always have a place to stay chez moi!!
I love the mix! And I hope your first day on the job went well. Transitions like this are hard but just know that, in, say, six months or so, you'll be all used to being a for-reals adult and comfortable in an exciting new life. Congrats on everything Katie!!!
Yay for you! A for reals librarian!
I have a similar mix from when I moved. It had "Leave This City" by the Sundays on it, and "Go West" by Liz Phair. Can't remember what else, but it helped me move, for sure.
I just want you to know that I was listeining to You Can't Always Get What You Want while I read your blog- thought, oh, wonderfully creepy in a "we are way too similar" kind of way. The song is still playing- I'm relating today as I study.
Miss you! (PS. I felt sad 2 times recently- (1) when I ran by your block, looked for your car, and then realized it wouldn't be there, and (2) when you changed your network to Milwaukee on facebook.)
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