L is for...

Library School, Things They Didn't Teach You In

1) What google-friendly phrases to use when trying to find a basic picture of a set of a stairs for a stortyime feltboard activity.

2) How to skillfully and tactfully answer the question: "Miss Katie Do You Believe In Jesus!?!?!" when it's asked by a 6 year old (and you're not sure what you believe anymore.)

3) That 5 year olds are a heck of a lot smarter and more grown up than anyone gives them credit for. Case in point: While reading a book about sheep not being able to fall asleep at a storytime and saying "I wonder why all these sheep can't fall asleep?", a little boy, Auggie, kept shouting out "Maybe they're nocturnal!"

Another example:
8 year old reading a Dear America book: I have a diary. I wrote my secret in it.
Me: I'd ask you to tell me what you wrote about but that would be kind of silly since it's your secret.
8 year old: Boyfriend problems.

4) How not to bust out laughing at either of these children.

5) How to find potty training books for parents but not get sucked into listening to them rant about their child's inability to potty train.

6) How to say potty training and keep a straight face.

7) How to effectively clean up vomit or some other bodily function (quick! to the janitorial closet!)...

8) ...without wanting to throw up

9) What the main plotlines are for Captain Underpants books.

10) That someday a young girl will walk into your library wearing pink and black pleather snake skin pants, a crushed velvet shirt with black and hot pink fun fur accents.