Katie's Adventures in Library Land

insert laugh track here

2008-07-02T08:09:00.000-07:00

While looking for some easy readers:
Me: Have you read this book, Cowgirl Kate and Cocoa?
Kasey, 6-years-old: Cocoa!? It's not even winter!

These are the books in your library

2008-06-28T12:19:00.001-07:00

Summer is never a fun time for public librarians. Sure, it's a productive time and it makes us look good--kids are reading, families are checking out materials and bringing their kids to programs--but man is it hard on the nerves. Yesterday afternoon, after witnessing a kid wapping his brother on the head with one of the summer reading program prizes, I busted out a librarian voice so stern I didn't even know I had it in me. Summer really does bring out the best in each and every one of us.

It doesn't help that our library has another big huge project that needs to be completed by the end of the summer. Basically, we have a bunch of books that have bad cataloging records that won't be compatible with our new library system, which will be arriving in September. Ultimately, this is a good thing; it's basically a big huge, easy as pie weeding project. It's just horrible timing. My little desk area in the children's room is covered in SRP sign up clipboards, SRP prizes, storytime sign up clipboards, storytime books and crafts and lots and lots of old books. A library volunteer pulled all of the books with old records and stacked them around my desk. I basically have a fort, built out of books, which probably used to be a dream of mine when I was younger. Which is all fine and good until one of the stacks topples and you can't get to your file cabinet and a kid knocks over another stack while picking up his Pizza Hut personal pan pizza coupon.

The only thing keeping me sane is the gems I'm finding in these stacks--I'm finding ridiculously outdated books, politically incorrect books and books that were old when I was a little kid. Examples:

"Festivals of West Germany." A perfect source for every child's nonfiction needs!

"The Truth About Old Wives Tales." Old Wives Tales they chose to tackle: "Hair of the Dog, the Ultimate Hangover Remedy," "Black Coffee Sobers You Up," "Beer Before Whiskey, Pretty Risky; Whiskey Before Beer, Never Fear," and my personal favorite "You Can't Get Pregnant If You Have Sex Standing Up." All of these helpful lessons could be found until recently in the juvenile section of the library. (by the way, if you were wondering, their verdict is not true, not true, maybe and not true.)

"World War II and the Modern Age" from the Universal History of the World series, dated 1966. Thus, the "Modern Age" involves putting the word astronaut in quotations (you know! those new fangled people who fly in space!), and featuring pictures of computers that make this look high tech. They also smell as modern as their content.

Out of the Mouths of Babes, The Violent Edition

2008-06-16T16:04:00.000-07:00

Mary, 2-years-old, speaking to her sister as "Mr. Zebra," the zebra puppet: Anna, I am going to come over there and bite you!

Grace, 3-years-old, to her brother Jack, while fighting about the computer: I'm going to cut your neck!

Eric, 12-year-old SRP volunteer, to fellow SRP volunteer, Christian: So I was totally two-timing this girl and she found out and she totally punched her!

Library Land Updates

2008-06-09T11:32:00.001-07:00

-The library flooded yesterday! Our basement is currently under about a foot of water, which also means that our summer reading program book prizes are also under a foot of water.

-I had my rain boots in my car so I was sent downstairs to investigate the extent of the damage. All of our reading program book prizes are soaking wet as are the entire contents of the annual Friends of the Library book sale. Not. Cool. And pretty depressing too.

-I'm pretty sure the summer reading program is cursed. It's the first one I've planned and everything is going wrong. Something goes wrong and I fix it. And then two days later, something else goes wrong. And it's only June. The damn thing hasn't even started yet. Who knows what July is going to bring.

-The apartment moving went wonderfully and I'm all settled in. Thanks to Hernia Movers. They truly are the potentate of totin' freight.

-There's a car in the apartment complex parking lot with two bumper stickers. 1) "I fake it so he buys me stuff." and 2) "I'm proud of my cub scout." I can't wait to meet my neighbors.

-There is a guy in the library with a little baby and the guy cannot be more than 20. And he's wearing a wedding ring. I feel old. And single.

-The other people in the children's room is a dad and his daughter. She's approx. 4 y.o. and she's playing on her dad's laptop. She just told her dad "Dad, I logged off!"

Insane in the Membrane (but hopeful about the future)

2008-05-18T12:06:00.000-07:00

It seems to me that I pick the worst possible times to do stuff. Why in god's name did I think moving on May 30th was a good idea!? There is major craziness happening at the library right now, as it is mere weeks away from the summer reading program kick off and I have to visit all of the elementary schools in town (there are only 5 but it definitely is a time suck.) Basically, I'm driving myself insane.

Evidence: Today is Sunday. Why then did I wake up at 7:30 this morning, think it was Monday, realize that I had to visit a school and that I had nothing planned? I'm sure everyone has those moments when they wake up and they don't know what day it is, but not only did I not know what day it was, I jumped out of bed, threw on a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt and was totally ready to go to work and throw stuff together for a school visit. I was grabbing my purse and my keys and trying to de-puff my hair when I thought to myself "Why didn't you do this when you worked on Sunday?" And then I paused, put down my keys and turned on the TV. Luckily, some kind anchorperson was talking about the weather and said "Well, it looks like Sunday's going to be a bit overcast but tomorrow it should brighten up a bit." And only then did I realize that today was Sunday and that I had plenty of time to grab some books for my school visit.

One of my favorite Counting Crows songs is "Amy Hit the Atmosphere" and there's a lyric that seems to be pertinent right now: "Today was just a day fading into another and that can't be what a life is for." That's how it feel right now. There's no distinction anymore between the weekend and the weekday and Monday is no different than Wednesday. I know a lot of that is to blame on the fact that I'm getting ready to move and getting everything set for the summer reading program. But, I've been here for a year and it seems like all of the days are fading together: work, go home, go back to work, go home, go back to work, go home. The only exciting thing I can add to conversations right about now is what I watch on PBS. And while PBS rocks, I don't think that's its purpose.

And regarding the firefighter: I messaged him on facebook, just telling him thanks for being so nice to the kids, and he responded very nicely and professionally, saying that they love serving their community and that I should contact them if I would like to schedule a program. I messaged back that that would be great and I am still awaiting a response. Truthfully, the novelty of all of it has sort of passed. It was nice to think about for a while but now? Eh. If I can get a program out of it, marvelous. If not, that's just fine by me. I'm just glad that I did *something.* It's been a very very long time since I've sucked it up and just put myself out there.

Speaking of bravery, I talked to one of my good friends yesterday and she told me that when I was living in Madison, I seemed brave and confident and like I took care of myself first. She said that I don't seem to be doing that anymore. I'm putting everyone else's needs in front of my own, mainly because I've lost that bravery. And she's right. I've been hiding ever since I moved here and it's taken it's toll. I'm always down on myself and I let people treat me "shabbily" (to quote the mom from Gidget). I think moving is going to help me get back to the old me. I know it's not an automatic miracle cure for what ails me but it's a new start. And it's not just that. I've decided that I need to get out more (stating the obvious here). In Madison, I had school, I had work, I had friends, I had happy hours. Here, I have work. I don't think I'm just going to happen upon a random group of people needing another happy hour participant so I'm taking a different approach. I've decided that I'm going to volunteer at the local humane society as a dog walker. I'm hoping this will give me something to do that isn't just work, something to talk about besides "My job is great." I'm also leaving my family friendly gym in the middle of my current town of residence (it really needs a nickname doesn't it?), joining the Y in my new town and starting back up with yoga classes and water aerobics, both of which have made me feel happy and less neurotic in the past. And if all else fails, I will make my mother happy and I will start going to church. (I'm hoping that my life feels full before that.... sorry Mom but I'm still having a "crisis of faith.")

I have a feeling June is going to be a good month. I just have to make it through the next few weeks (and hopefully I'll remember what day it is from now on...)

Yes. With Popcorn and Junior Mints.

2008-05-06T17:56:00.001-07:00

Sam: Miss Katie, have you watched all of the movies at the library?
Me: Well, I've seen some but not all.
Sam: Do you watch them in a big private library room by yourself?

Out of the Mouths of Babes: 10:15

2008-04-30T08:14:00.000-07:00

6-year-old boy: Do you have kids?
Me: Nope, I don't.
6-year-old boy: Well, if you get some, you should buy them legos.

Not Being Homeless is SOOOO Much Less Interesting Than a Fireman.

2008-04-28T15:28:00.000-07:00

Warning: This blog post is very long. It's also very obsessive and neurotic.

First, let's get the important but slightly less interesting news out of the way: I am no longer a rolling stone! I have found a place to live. I signed a lease on Friday and I will be moving May 31st. The place is north of my current state of residence, far enough away that I can go to the grocery store (and go to bars?) in peace but still close enough that the commute won't be a huge issue. It's a complex that was built in 1991 and it was the first place where I would only be losing a bedroom (not a dishwasher, garbage disposal, full sized stove and refrigerator and extra storage). I'm really pleased and I'm totally ready to move (and give you more details :))

Now onto the main reason for the post: On Tuesday evening, right in the middle of my family storytime, our fire alarm went off, and in short, I met a firefighter. A tall, remarkably attractive, great with kids, seemingly responsible and kind firefighter. This is going to sound lame but our 10 minute interaction (thank god for little kids who want to meet firefighters!) was pretty much the romantic highlight of the time I've spent living in this ridiculous little town. And how much can two people flirt when there are little kids running around?

Then Tuesday night and then all day Wednesday and Thursday, I witnessed what happens when ten middled aged library workers come together to matchmake. Through the obsessive nature of my coworkers and their information finding skills, I now know his name, where he lives, what everyone who knows him thinks of him (great! nice! a catch!), what his senior picture looks like (thank god we keep all those high school yearbooks at the library!*rolls eyes*) and his age. The adorable firefighter is 21. 21! Barely! (His birthday was two weeks ago). I'm 25. More specifically, I'm 25 1/2. Everyone that I've talked to (and yes, I've talked to quite a few because well I'm lame) reassures me that this isn't a big deal. My coworkers tell me that I've got to take advantage of this opportunity. They've suggested that I call up the fire chief (who just happens to be Kelly, the circ assistant's mother-in-law's neighbor! small town!) and tell him how great he was with the kids and ask if he can come back. Or I could show up at the bimonthly flea market where all the firefighters have to work and stalk him that way. Supposedly he also plays softball and they have a game every Friday night! Jill, another circulation assistant, knows his mother and would be happy to introduce me. Our reference librarian suggested we call him up and tell him his card is expired so he'll come in and rectify the situation. Etc. Etc. Etc. It's out of control.

Here's the thing: I understand that underneath my coworkers' insanity, they're basically right. It's rare to meet someone with such good qualities and I certainly haven't done that since moving here. And yes, four years isn't a big deal. And I appreciate the fact that they want me to be happy here (not that having a cute firefighter equals happiness but well, it might.) So, let's say I forget about the fact that he's only 21 (he's been drinking legally for two weeks. I've been drinking legally for 4.5 years!). What now? How do you pursue or set up opportunities in this type of situation? This is going to make me sound like an alcoholic but I've only met/interacted/pursued men when alcohol was present. It may have been a party hosted by a mutual friend, a grad student social held at a bar, or tailgating at a sporting even but there was alcohol. And if I met the person when there wasn't alcohol involved, our future interactions had alcohol. With the fireman, I've only known him in a professional context and vice versa. And I don't go out in bars where I live right now (nor would I want to) so it's not like I'm going to run into him on a Friday night at one of the four bars in this town. I'd like to just do nothing and wait. Perhaps he'll come into the library? Perhaps I'll see him in the grocery store? Or should I try to make a move in a different way? I know he's on facebook (my coworkers aren't the only information professionals :)) and I'm sure I could email the fire department and say thanks for giving the kids junior firefighter badges. I'm not sure I want to look like a stalker or a 25 year old predator going after the younger man, especially one who grew up in this town and seems to be well liked by everyone.

If you made it to the end of this insanity, thanks for sticking it out! Also? Help!

Sad But Sorta True: Out of the Mouths of Babes, 12:05

2008-04-03T10:05:00.000-07:00

Fergus, age 2, while coloring a picture: I'm going to do my best work!
McNessa, his sister, age 6: You don't have to do your best work. It's just the library.

Wherever He Laid His Head Was His Home: Part II

2008-04-02T10:39:00.000-07:00

The great apartment hunt continues. For the last week or two, I have been wracked with indecision--my thought process sounded a lot like this: "That one place! No the other! Just wait! But that one place! The downtown! The drive! The other place! Go see it again! Take pictures! It's still so small! That bathtub is disgusting! But it's cheap! It has big windows! I don't want to live there! But maybe I should!"

I retoured the second apartment and took pictures. And then looked at them and looked at them and looked at them some more. I finally sent pictures out to some friends and my mom. Pretty much everyone said "Yeah, it's fine. Typical. Standard. Livable." And that's exactly what I thought. My mom also added "You would have to throw away a lot of your stuff because there's no room for it in that apartment and you're not bringing it to our house." This morning I asked my dear friend Laura what she thought. She wisely said, "I think you just seriously need to ask yourself if you're going to dread coming home to that apartment every night or if you'd be happy to come home." She also said "Living in a crappy place just makes life crappy." Indeed the girl is a wise one. And honestly, that's something I hadn't really thought about (yes, I'm not smart). And when I really thought about it, it was clear that this wee little apartment wasn't the place for me. And it was definitely not a place where I would want to live for a few years (the ultimate goal in all of this apartment hunting is to find a place that is reasonable but also a place where I would be willing to live for more than a year.)

So the apartment hunt is back up and running. I've been looking at classifieds and Laura sent me listing from craigslist and here are the highlights thus far:

Last night, called a place in my current town of residence and had a lovely conversation that went something like this:
Me: Hi, I'm calling about the apartment for rent.
Lady: Where did you get this number? The local newspaper? Which newspaper? The Journal Sentinel?
Me: Ummmm. The number was on a "for rent" sign in the front yard...
Lady: Where was the house? Is it in *current town of residence*?
Me: *Soooo confused* Ummm, yes? Has it been rented?
Lady: I don't know. Because we don't have a place for rent. You have the wrong number and we've been receiving about 10 calls a day about that place. So where is it in *current town of residence*?
Me: it's about a block from downtown.
Lady: Okay, good, I'm going to drive down there and figure out what's going on. Thanks. *hangs up*

Verdict: It's probably not a good sign if you're future landlords can't even get the phone number on the sign correct... And besides, even if I'd like to call them, I can't!

This afternoon, I called about a one bedroom for $470.
Me: Hi, I'm calling in regard to the one bedroom apartment.
Dude: Where did you see the listing?
Me: In the Journal Sentinel.
Dude: Do you know where the apartment is?
Me: Yes, I do.
Dude: Okay, well, our apartment complex is right off the highway (proceeds to give directions) When would you want to move in?
Me: Probably May 1st or June 1st.
Dude: And where do you live now?
Me: *Current place of residence*
Dude: What do you do there?
Me: Ummm, I'm a children's librarian? (question mark as in why are you asking this?)
Dude: And why are you leaving?
Me: *thinks why are you asking me this?*I'm looking for a smaller place. I have a two bedroom right now.
Dude: Ahh, so, you kicked him out?
Me: Him?? What? No, that's certainly not the case.
Dude: Hahahhahahahaha. Well, why don't you give the building manager a call. His name is Leonard and he works the 3rd shift. So, give him a call and you can go tour the building at 3pm.

Verdict: I think you would be right in assuming that I did not give Leonard a call. And all of those questions? To quote Salt-n-Pepa, "It's none of your business."

So, the start of the second part of the great apartment hunt (woah confusing) is not going well. I will report back with more news. In the meantime, please send all of your good apartment hunting karma this way.

You Know You're From Wisconsin When...

2008-03-24T13:28:00.000-07:00

While ordering the book Bratfest at Tiffany's for your library, you automatically think how hilarious and bizarre it would be to have Brat Fest at Tiffany's.

Wherever He Laid His Head Was His Home

2008-03-17T11:24:00.001-07:00

Dudes, I am in a world of trouble. In a month or two, I think I'm going to be a homeless children's librarian. As mentioned previously, I'm trying to move. There are two reasons for moving: 1) to save more money 2) to somehow maybe try to get a life. Honestly, reason #1 is the most important reason for moving; #2 would be a nice side effect. Realizing that my lease will soon be up, I called my landlord, told her I was going to be moving out, got myself on a month by month lease and started looking. The great apartment hunt search started on Saturday and as expected, it sucked. And now you get to hear all about it. (Feel free to stop reading now...)

Problems:
1) I have limited financial resources. I'm not completely broke but I'm an underpaid children's librarian with a substantial student loan payment. The cheaper the better, especially since I'd really like to save up some money for the future.
2) I don't want to live in a cheap apartment! There, I said it! Who does!?!
3) The cheap apartments are further north, farther away from Madison, my social life in Milwaukee, and most importantly, my job.
4) I don't want to live in my current city of residence. I want to go to the grocery store in peace.

I have three options that I can see right now:

1) Move to the first apartment: I love the idea of this apartment but I don't know if the reality is going to work. The idea: It's in a town completely removed from my current place of residence. The apartment is in a cool building that's close to the downtown area but not smack dab in the midst of it. It's also two blocks from the lake. I can see myself feeling less fishbowly there and I love the idea of being able to walk a block to a cute coffee shop and then walk around by the lake. However, the reality is a little bit more complicated. Basically, the entire problem is that it's 20 minutes north of my job, which also means it's 20 minutes farther away from my social life.
It's $495 a month, which is $120 less a month than my current place (which would save me $1440 a year) but heat and electricity are not included (same as my current place) and obviously the money spent on gas would suck up quite a bit of that $120. It doesn't have air conditioning (I'd be praying for a nice lake breeze). It doesn't have a dishwasher but I have one now and it's such a piece of shit that I just hand wash everything. It also has the ugliest carpet I've ever seen (that being said, the carpet is brand new.)

2) The second apartment: This apartment is much closer to my job (but still a bit of a drive as it is in the middle of frickin nowhere) and it is a steal of a deal. It's $500 a month and heat and electricity are included. I'd also have an air conditioner which I can run like a crazy overheating girl and not have to worry about paying for it (and then feel guilty about my carbon footprint...) It also is a corner apartment which means I have two big huge windows in my living room. The problem though is that it's basically a efficiency with a bedroom. The kitchen is one wall with a teeensy strip of linoleum to differentiate it from the living room/dining room. The rest of the place is really really ridiculously outdated. The bathroom needs a major facelift (nothing too gross though) and the entire place looks flimsy. And when I went to tour the place, the woman giving the tour said "Hey, are you the children's librarian at the public library?" Definitely no escaping my job... Do I just put up with being a bit cramped for a year or two and save some money?

3) Wait. As mentioned above, I am on a month by month lease right now. I could definitely wait it out and see if anything else comes along. This would probably be the smart thing to do but I'm slightly worried that if I wait, I'm just going to find that there isn't that much more out there (in terms of quality or cost.)

I've always sucked at making decisions. I am Little Miss Indecisive and no matter what I choose, I will probably regret it (and probably will end up moving in a year anyway.) I'm currently making an Excel spreadsheet with pros and cons of each option. I'll let you know my decision.

Out of the Mouthes of Babes: February

2008-03-03T12:00:00.001-08:00

Dear Lord, I'm a horrible blogger and blog commenter. I'm sorry I have disappeared. However! Exciting things are afoot (I need to talk about moving! And planning summer reading programs! And attending my first conference!) and I promise I will have more to blog about in the future (and I will go through my overflowing bloglines and comment on your posts!). In the meantime, however, here are some highlights from the children's room during February:

Colin, age 3: "I want to play on the computers Mom!"
Colin's mom: "But Colin, those children are already playing. You can play when they're done."
Colin, age 3: "They're never going to be done!!! They live here!"

While teaching Junior Achievement to 2nd graders-
Me: Why do we need to have businesses in our community?
Courtney: To make money!
Evan: So there are places to work.
Connor: So we can give money to the Army.

Grace, 2-years-old: You're Miss Katie! You're my liberry teacher! You live at the liberry!

Grace (yes, another Grace.), 3-years-old: We got a new kitty and we haven't named her but we're going to name her soon and Joey has this thing and we go swimming and you swim and you swim and you swim and then you hit your head on the wall and then you have a grumpy face!
*pause pause pause pause*
Grace's mom: Are you talking about the Wii?
Grace: Yeah!

Evan, age 3: Mama, what's your name?
Evan's Mom, Eileen: Honey, you know my name
Evan: *whispers in her ear*
Evan's Mom: Evan, my name is not Obi Wan.

Mary, age 4, talking about her brother and sister: ...and Nathan won't eat pepperoni! And Lucy said "Naaaathan! Just try it!" But he won't. Because it's too tangy."

Back story: Gordon, 6 y.o., is obsessed with Star Wars and Transformers and has read every single book in our library on those subjects. So, now when he comes in, I find him books but have to tell him that "we don't have it at our library but there's a copy in the system and we can have them send it to our library so you can take it home with you." Thus...
Gordon: Miss Katie, can you see if The Transformers Ultimate Guide is in the system? *pause* Whatever that means.

Grace (it's an epidemic!), 6-years-old: Olivia, let's go to the bubbler!
Olivia, also 6: Okay! I love water! It's my best friend!

All You Need is Love

2008-02-11T12:52:00.000-08:00

Seeing as Valentine's Day is fast approaching and I haven't posted a blog entry in a ridiculously long time, I thought I would post some thoughts on Valentine's Day. I've been blogging for little more than 2 years and it would seem that Valentine's Day is my favorite blog-worthy holiday--it's the only holiday I've posted about consistently (see here and here. It would also seem that I only know how to name Valentine's Day oriented blog entries "All You Need is Love") So, to continue with the tradition, here is yet another random Valentine's Day blog entry... titled, of course, All You Need is Love.

Things To Be Sad About On Valentine's Day:

1) I'm single. Once again. This year is different because I have never been SO single in my life. In years past, I've been single and dealing with boy drama but at least there were boys around. Since moving to this wee little town, I haven't had any boy drama... because there are no boys within the county line. Sure, there was that one guy on my birthday who told me I smelled nice and then proceeded to grope my ass (thanks douchebag!) but forgive me if I don't count that.

2) My friends are single. Sure, because they're single, I get to have someone to hang out with on Valentine's Day (we're not shrinking away, letting the couples have all the fun! We're going to a fancy schmancy cool kid restaurant!) But, they are single because in the last six months, each of them has had two different guys treat them like crap. It sucks to have each of them start dating someone (and have the corresponding "new boy!" feelings) and then shortly after have to see them deal with someone who is incapable of acting like a grownup or who says things he doesn't mean or who just can't (or won't) get his shit together and be a good boyfriend.

3) The never ending snow and never ending cold and never ending shit weather. Dudes, it's driving me mad.

Ridiculous pointless things to cancel out the aforementioned (courtesy of YouTube):

1) "Best of My Love" by Emotions. "Do do do dot! Do do do dot! My love! My love!" Instant Happiness:

2) This random video featuring the song "Reach Out in the Darkness" by Friend and Lover. I love that there's some dude sitting in his basement, videotaping his record player and uploading the videos to YouTube. Of course, I added it to my favorites so I'm just encouraging him. Still, I agree with Friend and Lover. I would say that it would be so groovy if people finally got together.

3) The writers strike is over! Which means we'll soon have more of these to watch:

4) James McAvoy's impersonation of Ryan Seacreast. Honestly, James McAvoy could recite multiplication tables to me and I'd be happy.

I hope you all have a wonderful Valentine's Day! Please feel free to judge me on my YouTube obsession and all of my lame interests :)

****Unrelated Sidenote: Klara! I don't know if you're still reading but I tried to email you about the collection development questions and the email was sent back to me. If you still need an interviewee (I can't promise I'll have anything helpful to say...), please feel free to email me at sweetpea1182001atyahoodotcom.****

I'm Looking for a Hard Headed Woman*

2008-01-24T14:14:00.000-08:00

Confession that probably isn't at all shocking to you, my faithful readers: I hate it when I look like I don't know what I'm doing. Generally I avoid situations in which I have to depend on someone else or let everyone know that I am clueless. And I'm not going to lie--I don't know what I'm doing most of the time (that's life, isn't it?) and this creates issues. In my non-work related life, this all stems from my issues with vulnerability. I hate being vulnerable, I hate asking for help (and if I do because I trust you, I will feel guilty and say "sorry. thank you. sorry. thank you." until you want to kick me.), and I hate looking foolish on accident. (If I'm *trying* to look foolish, then that's a whole 'nother story) This is why I quit piano and quit clarinet: I wasn't good at it automatically and I couldn't handle it. In my professional life, I want to look as professional as possible and in my crazy little mind, that means never asking for help and always knowing what to do/say. (I know this is ridiculous and dangerous.) If I'm confused, I don't say, "Could you explain that to me?" or "I don't know what this means. Do you? Could you tell me?" or even better, "I've never done this before. Help." I pretend I know what I'm talking about and figure it out as I go along. This definitely creates issues but so far, I've survived. Perhaps even thrived??

Until now (dun dun dun). I won't go into tons of detail (I"m sure this blog is going to get me dooced at some point...) but the library is going through lots of changes right now. We're planning for the future, for a new building to be dooce-worthily specific, and because I'm the only one in my department, somehow I am supposed to meet with committees and discuss plans. These plans have been on the table for the last 10 years so everyone knows what they're talking about except me. It is horrid. Absolutely, panic-attackingly horrid. It's making me crazy.

There are two parts to the crazy... well, three if you include the fact that I've figured out how many parts of the crazy exist. Gah. Anyway. So. Crazy I: Too much responsibility now rests on my weak little unprofessional can't ask for help shoulders. There are architects and committee members who are asking for my opinion and then taking it into consideration to build a building which is supposed to serve this community for the next 10 years at least. What in crap's name do I know? I'm some little straight out of grad school twerp! Crazy II: This new building situation is like a challenge sent from God (or from the devil... how knows.) The girl who hates it when it looks like she knows nothing, knows nothing and is being called on it! Constantly!

Example of the crazy: Two weeks ago, I suggested window seats while looking at the library plans. Window seats are a lovely place for a child to read! For families to sit together! For conserving space! Today, there's a blueprint with window seats! Oh god, they took my opinion and used it! Then, a board member tells me that my idea is basically crap because window seats are uncomfortable in reality and no one sits on them, except maybe to take naps on them and we do not want that happening in the library. She visited libraries with the library design board three years ago and she talked to library designers and they would agree with her. I then have to say "That's a good point. I hadn't thought about that." Now I know that my opinions are worthwhile and that I do know a thing or two. I went to library school and at some point in some class I took, I'm pretty sure we talked about library architecture for children's spaces. But I also know that I am new to this process and don't know a damn thing about actually doing any of it. I'm having issues finding the happy medium between expressing my opinions and trusting them and not just making shit up so I stop looking green around the ears.

Okay, phew, I'm glad that's out. I'm not really asking for advice (see, can't ask for help! :))--I just needed to write this all down. Of course, if you have advice, I'm all ears...

*Is it bad that I really want some guy to fall in love with me and equate me with this song? And also perhaps She's Always a Woman to Me by Billy Joel? Yeah, probably.

Crap! What now?

2008-01-08T07:38:00.001-08:00

This is going to sound completely ridiculous but the fact that it is 2008 has sent me into what the experts might possibly call a "quarter-life crisis." This perturbs me to no end. I'm practically gagging at the idea of being like the annoying (but awesome) characters in St. Elmo's Fire. But, I'm going through the general symptoms of malaise, freaking out about my financial instability (I should be saving for retirement!), wondering if this *gestures grandly to general surroundings* is it, and if perhaps I should have moved to Key Largo to be a bartender before picking a career. It's ridiculous, I know but I am freaked out. And I'm blaming it all on 2008.

I'm not one of those people who has their life planned out. I don't have a timeline of important events like when I'll get married or when I'll have children or when I'll buy my first home. But, I did have a small timeline when I was in college. It involved two dates: 2005 and 2007. I knew that I would graduate in 2005 from undergrad and I would graduate from grad school in 2007. Slight problem though: I never though beyond 2007. 2008 never even occurred to me! (Yes I am an idiot.) So now I'm sitting in my little town, working at my little library and wondering about what's next. I can see myself staying at my job for the next 5 years, gladly. This doesn't seem like a very long amount of time but let's do some math. I'm 25 right now. In 5 years, I'll be 30. 30!!!!!!!!!!!! Gaah! I'm not worried about being thirty but if I'm still living in this little town with no social life to speak of, worrying about being seen buying wine at the grocery store, I will be very worried about being thirty.

I want a full and happy life and in this little town, I'm not finding that. Yes, my job is great but I can't just survive on a good job. I need a social life! I have friends from college that I get to see once a week and thank god for them. But I've been living here 8 months and I haven't met ANYONE. Not even someone I could write off as being boring or stupid (yup, I'm judgmental). Part of this is my fault: I don't feel comfortable going out in this wee little town and cutting a rug. Heck, I don't even feel comfortable buying Tylenol PM in this town (really, I went to the Walgreens one town over...) And that *severely* limits the people that I meet.

I'm not really a resolutions girl (I make them and break them minutes later) but I'm going to make a change in the new year. If I was a 40-year-old man, I would buy a Maserati. In order to fix this quarter-life crisis thing, I have a three step plan:

1) Move. Currently I'm living in a two bedroom apartment in the town where I work. It's too expensive, I don't need two bedrooms and I really don't need to live five minutes away from the library.

2) Find a new gym. My gym is also located in the town where I work. I hate my gym! It's way too family oriented and they have nothing fun to do except lift weights and walk on the treadmill. I hate walking on the treadmill. And I hate that I see people from the library. So I'm not going. And now I feel like a slug.

3) Grow out my hair... maybe. This isn't really going to help. But perhaps my boredom and malaise will be cured with a new hairstyle?

So, that's that. We'll see how this plan works out. I'll keep you guys updated (finally, something to write about besides work!)

Little Unhappy Blog

2007-12-28T11:54:00.000-08:00

My poor sad blog. I am horrible at posting. Again, it's not from lack of trying. I have four or five different entries I was going to post but didn't. Every effort at a coherent fails so they get saved and then I forget that they exist. So, here is a random series of thoughts for today to help me get back into the blogging swing of things.

1) It is blizzarding outside and I'm supposed to be driving home tonight. It seems that every time I've tried to drive back to my hometown in the past three months, there has been shitty weather trying to hold me back. Ice storms, fog, blizzards (oh my!) Half of me knows that I could easily stay home tonight and wait it out until morning. But the other irresponsible, stubborn, starved for human contact half of me knows if I drive back tonight, I will see friends, have fun, eat good food, drink drinks, etc. If I stay back at my apartment tonight, I will watch PBS (Rick Steves!) and starve (I have no food in my apartment) and think about all of the fun I could be having if I just acted like a normal Wisconsin person (please see #7) and drove through a few inches of snow.

2) A lot of people wake up dreading the fact that they have to go to work. I wake up dreading the fact that I have to wear dress pants to work. Currently my nice black work pants are full of static cling and are digging into my stomach. Also, the shoes that used to be really comfortable have suddenly become horribly horibly uncomfortable and I'd really like to take them off and wander around in my socks, which probably wouldn't be very professional.

3) Right now, I should be working on my storytime crafts. Our winter/spring storytime hour starts on January 17th and I should have 10 crafts ready to go. I have 8 and I am totally stuck. I've been looking at kids craft sites, library programming sites, weird old craft books I found in the storytime closet and I have found nothing. And instead of just sucking it up and doing it (have I mentioned storytime craft planning is my least favorite part of the job), I'm dwelling on my uncomfortable boots and obsessively checking the weather forecast. And then next week I will be scrambling to throw together two crafts which I will inevitably find lackluster.

I is for... (Reprise)

2007-12-11T10:47:00.000-08:00

I haven't talked about my library's ex for a while, mainly because there's nothing much to talk about anymore. She's moved on (still sending pictures and emails) and I'm no longer getting asked "What happened to Miss Erika?" But, last night, something happened that's too good not to share, which is why I'm digging up the "I is for In the Hood" and reprising it (can reprise be a verb?)

Miss Erika is sending out holiday cards, the kind with pictures that you can get from Walmart or Walgreens. They have three pictures of her with various kids from the library (is that allowed!?) with the phrase "Happy Holidays from the Hood" below the pictures. This is crazy, right? In my mixed up mind, it's one thing to throw around the phrase "in the hood" obsessively. Lord knows I tend to pick up phrases and throw them around in excess (lately I've been saying 'Thanks man" a lot, which I picked up from one of the library kids). But to put it on a Christmas card, that's a whole new level. This idea popped into her head and instead of eschewing it, she took the idea, ran with it all the way over to Walgreens and placed an order. Who is she sending this card to? Her former employers, her relatives, her friends? Her coworkers!?!?!

Seriously, it's mind boggling. Even more mind boggling than the fact that it's a frickin blizzard, every other library in the area is closed and we are still open.

Out of the Mouthes of Babes 1:25pm

2007-11-29T11:19:00.001-08:00

Robbie the 5 year old: Mom? Do germs talk?

Tis the Season...

2007-11-28T14:07:00.001-08:00

Remember that list about the things they don't teach you in library school? Well, I have another item to add to the list. They do not teach you how to talk to kids about Santa.

When I came back to work on Monday, there was a big ol' box on my desk, decorated in Christmas wrapping paper, where kids can drop off their letters to Santa. They're given to a group of women in town who will write back to the kids as Santa. According to the other staff members, this is tradition in town and it usually goes over pretty well. What they failed to tell me was that I would be fielding potentially difficult questions like: "How are they going to get to Santa?" "I already sent my letter to Santa... if I send him more than one, will he get confused?" "Does this go to the fake Santa or the real Santa?" "Miss Katie, do you believe in Santa?"

These questions are causing me a great amount of stress and angst. I don't like answering these questions and I don't know how I'm supposed to answer these questions.

I believed in Jolly Old St. Nick for way longer than societally acceptable. I was an only child, my parents believed it was important for children to believe and they took great lengths to ensure that I would never have any doubts. These lengths included having Santa come while we were at church, using different wrapping paper, making our backyard neighbor dude write the "To Katie, From Santa" slips, and finally having same backyard neighbor dude's wife come over, eat some of the cookies, let the dog out of its crate, open the fireplace doors and put a little bit of cotton ball (i.e. santa's trim!) fuzz on the fireplace door handles. How could I not believe? But once I figured it out (or rather, I started doubting Santa, I figured out that the tooth fairy's dollar bills smelled like my dad's wallet and my parents gave up on all of it), I didn't have to worry about it anymore. I didn't have any little siblings and my little cousins never tried engage me in a Q&A about Santa. This is new territory.

After dealing with three days of this madness, I'm trying my damnedest to just be an overbeliever of Santa and sound as earnest as possible. Also, I've decided that Santa uses the postal service and fake Santas deliver the message to real Santa. Any additional advice?

You're Awful, Awful Good to Look At

2007-11-19T13:36:00.000-08:00

In order for this story to work, you need to know that I am utterly horrible at accepting compliments. So, since I cannot accept a compliment to save my life, whenever anyone compliments me, I usually respond using these three tried and true methods:

1) Accept compliment and respond with a fact that makes the compliment less valid. This is my favorite method. Examples: "That's a really nice sweater!" "Thanks! I bought it like five years ago!" OR "That's a pretty necklace!" "Thanks! I bought it at Target! It was really cheap!"

2) Dismiss with an unsavory tidbit. Examples: "You smell really nice" "Oh, thanks but I'm not wearing any perfume. It's probably my hair pomade which I think smells horrible." Or "Katie, your hair looks nice." "Thanks, I took a bath instead of a shower and I didn't have time to wash my hair so it's probably just the dirty bathwater hair effect." (And yes, I've actually said these things.)

3) Laugh sarcastically, thus dismissing the compliment. "You have the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen." "HA! Hahahahahahaha!" "It's just so sexy when a girl is a designated driver" (I'm not making that one up) "HAhahahahahahahahahahahahahaha." "When I walked into the bar and saw your beautiful face, I knew you were someone I needed to talk to." "HA! *rolls eyes*" These compliments are ridiculous and obviously insincere; how can you not laugh? Generally, number #3 is only used in a slimy bar setting while talking to icky, button down shirt wearing men. However, I had to bust out tactic #3 at work today. While I was talking to a performer for the summer reading program who had visited our library last summer, he told me that I was the most marvelous children's librarian he had ever met and that I was probably the top children's librarian in the nation! I was witty and well spoken and professional and kind! I laughed, pretty loudly. And I think he was slightly put off. But I had to! This dude met me in my first month of work when I was all twitchy and worried and I spoke to him for 15 minutes tops. And! When we ended our conversation, he told me "Nancy, it was great speaking with you." Nancy is another woman who works at the library who helps me out during programs. I passed on the compliment to her though... and she laughed too, natch.

That being said, you guys are marvelous, witty, well spoken, professional and kind. Thank you for reading :)

Dr. Strangelove

2007-11-14T09:28:00.000-08:00

I just had a nice young boy, probably age 11 or 12, asking if the library had any books on how to make bombs.

At least he prefaced the question with "This is going to sound strange..."

A series of slightly related thoughts.

2007-11-08T09:21:00.001-08:00

-It is germ city in the library. There are four little kids in the children's room right now and they have all coughed (without covering their mouths of course!) in the last 2 minutes.

-A little boy named Phil sneezed directly on my hand today at storytime. Twice. (I was helping him cut out a snake mobile.)

-The germaphobe in me is freaking out.

-It's my birthday today. I'm 25 (!!!)

-Parker Posey shares my birthday. As does Tara Reid (dear god.)

-I REFUSE to be sick for my birthday or for my birthday celebration this weekend.

-I'm drinking so much water that I'm peeing every 20 minutes (blog overshare?) and I've washed my hands raw.

It's Too Early in the Morning for God's Plan

2007-11-07T07:43:00.000-08:00

A grandmotherly type came in this morning searching for Barney CDs. She was one of those people who use your name a lot in order to seem more personable i.e. "Hi *looks down at name tag* Katie, I'm going to need your help." or "Thanks, Katie, these are going to be great." or "Katie, I think we need a few more." or "Katie, tell me how this is going to work. They're going to send them to me?"

This was slightly annoying but it was fine until she busted out this statement: "Oh you'll be learning these Barney songs real soon I'm sure, Katie!" I sort of laughed and she fired back with "Oh you will! You'll see! In a few years, you'll have your own Barney watchers Katie!" And I laughed again and said "Maybe!" And then it got worse. She put her arm on my shoulder and said very forcefully, "Katie, you'll see. You don't know God's plan. You've just got to trust in him sweetheart."

Bleeeech.

This brings up a very interesting question that Marty posed in the comments a few entries back: "So, is this whole children's librarian thing making you totally NOT want to have kids, or making you kind of want to have them? I have no idea where you stood on this issue before, just wonder if the job is pushing you in either direction."

It's a very good question. In theory, I'm okay with being childless. I'd be more than happy being a godmother or an Auntie Katie. I love kids but I'm just not sure that actually having children is the right decision for me. And I'm not entirely sure I feel comfortable bringing a child into this crazy world of ours. Who knows what the state of the earth is going to be in 80 years? But, then again, maybe all this will change if I meet someone, fall in love and get married. Maybe then I'll get the motherly impulses. My job hasn't really changed my thoughts on any of this. It's actually kept me pretty balanced. There are definitely kids that make me want to have a few of my own. And there are parents that make me want to be just like them. But then 15 minutes later, a terror of a child comes in and these crazy parents are acting like idiots and I'm faced with the reality that having a child is a crap shoot. You never know what you're going to come out with--one of those kids that everyone loves or terror on two legs. And who knows what I'd be like as a parent. I don't think anyone sets out to be a bad parent--it just kind of happens. And I'd rather not it happen to me :)

Thanks?

2007-11-05T18:17:00.000-08:00

Every Monday I work the late shift (12:30-9pm) and tonight a mom from one of my storytimes came in to request some books. She was sans kids for the night and since there wasn't anyone in the children's room, we were making small talk. She was telling me that she liked the storytimes a lot (yay!), that her daughter Samantha liked them too (woot!), and that I reminded her of herself (okay!) because I was "nice and mushy."

Wah? Mushy? I'm mushy? I guess I do have a sweet, affable quality going for me at work. I say hi to kids, I tell them they're doing a great job on their coloring sheets, I smile a lot and I suppose I seem happy but mushy? Mushy seems like an annoying thing to be. But perhaps I'm wrong...

This is the definition of mushy according to www.thefreedictionary.com

1. Resembling mush in consistency; soft.

2. Informal

a. Excessively sentimental. See Synonyms at sentimental.

b. Given to or displaying mawkish affection or amorousness.

Huh. I know she was just being nice and I'm glad that she likes what I'm doing but I'm stuck on mushy.

*Sidenote: If you google mushy, these are some of the most relevant images:

M is for...

2007-10-31T11:51:00.000-07:00

Meh.

Truth be told, I am bored with this alphabet thing. I'm kind of sick of it and I kind of want to be done with it. There I said it. I can't quite tell if I'm bored with my blog in general or only with the alphabet-ness. I'm hoping I'm not bored with my blog. Maybe I am. Huh. Let's see. Well, my main complaint with the letter entries was that I couldn't do any off the cuff blogging. Everything needed to be planned or entries that seemed funny at the time had to be saved (but then of course never seemed funny later... when they were actually the right letter.) And then I repeat stories, like the kid saying that maybe the sheep were nocturnal! Jeez. I'm sick of planning. So, let's go back to off the cuff blogging. We'll try that for a while and then see how it goes.

First off the cuff topic, bad parenting behavior. I've seen a lot of lately. And I'm not a parent nor was I a kid who had lots of brothers and sisters to watch. I'm an only child children's librarian with no understanding of how to raise children. However, I'm also not an idiot and the following things really pushed my buttons: If your toddler aged son is pulling books off the shelves and yelling and screaming unhappily and throwing our stuffed animals and basically destroying our happy little children's section, you should not LAUGH at him. You should stop him. And when you're telling other parents, "oh he's split his top and bottom lip twice in the last week!" with a chuckle that's not a good sign.

Also, you and your 10 year old son should not be sparing ala karate kid in the library--you shouldn't have started it in the first place and you shouldn't laugh when he trips, falls and hits his head on the new book display. You're his dad, not his frienemy.

Next: Slippery slope behaviors.
Yesterday, while I was at work, all of my coworkers were saying that they would all be wearing their orange and black for Halloween. I do not own any orange shirts (nor do I want to own any) so I took a trip to Target and today I am wearing an orange long sleeved shirt with a little black cat on it. I'm wearing it with a black zip up sweater and khakis. In theory it's not horrible. It's actually quite cute. However, a thought hit me when I arrived at work today: I wore a holiday themed outfit to work. Yes, it's just a cute long sleeved t-shirt but next it'll be a themed necklace that I bought at a craft fair. And then all of a sudden I'm wearing holiday vests with matching turtlenecks or even worse!!!! A holiday themed jumper. It is a slippery slope people. Constant vigilance!

L is for...

2007-10-24T12:55:00.000-07:00

Library School, Things They Didn't Teach You In

1) What google-friendly phrases to use when trying to find a basic picture of a set of a stairs for a stortyime feltboard activity.

2) How to skillfully and tactfully answer the question: "Miss Katie Do You Believe In Jesus!?!?!" when it's asked by a 6 year old (and you're not sure what you believe anymore.)

3) That 5 year olds are a heck of a lot smarter and more grown up than anyone gives them credit for. Case in point: While reading a book about sheep not being able to fall asleep at a storytime and saying "I wonder why all these sheep can't fall asleep?", a little boy, Auggie, kept shouting out "Maybe they're nocturnal!"

Another example:
8 year old reading a Dear America book: I have a diary. I wrote my secret in it.
Me: I'd ask you to tell me what you wrote about but that would be kind of silly since it's your secret.
8 year old: Boyfriend problems.

4) How not to bust out laughing at either of these children.

5) How to find potty training books for parents but not get sucked into listening to them rant about their child's inability to potty train.

6) How to say potty training and keep a straight face.

7) How to effectively clean up vomit or some other bodily function (quick! to the janitorial closet!)...

8) ...without wanting to throw up

9) What the main plotlines are for Captain Underpants books.

10) That someday a young girl will walk into your library wearing pink and black pleather snake skin pants, a crushed velvet shirt with black and hot pink fun fur accents.

K is for...

2007-10-02T11:33:00.001-07:00

Katie (natch :))

Basically I'm an egotistical maniac and can't help but name the K entry after myself... sorry. Last summer I took a storytelling class and we started the class by introducing ourselves and telling the story of our name. We could tell the history behind it, what it means, why our parents gave us said name and any other stories that might be entertaining or insightful. It was such a great way to start a class--we all have a name (duh) and having lived with said name, we have a lifetime of stories to tell about it. And after you've heard a person's name story, it's pretty difficult to forget their name.

So here my name story. My name is Katie--not Katherine or Kathleen. It is just plain Katie. Most government officials and college admissions counselors refuse to believe this--"No sweetheart, you have to put your FULL name on your application. I know everyone calls you Katie but you have to put the name on your birth certificate." My mom's name is Veryl Helen and my dad's name is Melvin Gerhardt... it's no wonder I got to be Katie Lynn. My parents debated between Kimberly and Katherine but Kimberly was rejected (thank goodness--no offense to you Kimberlys out there). Katherine seemed unnecessary since they planned to call me Katie from day one anyway. I love being an original Katie. It's more common now but as a younger child, I was unique (and unable to find Katie keychains and bike license plates). Since my actual name is already a nickname for many, I don't really have a tried and true nickname. Close friends call me Kate. My dad calls me Kate but also Katie Bell. My mom calls me Katie Girl (who knows why...).

When I was in elementary school, I was the only Katie in my class and it never occurred to me that my name might be common. Then I went to middle school and became friends with two other girls named Katie. Then I went to high school and met another Katy. And then in grad school, I lived with Katy from high school and met another Katie. I now have 5 Katie/ys in my phone.

Another nice thing about being a Katie is the songs. Katie's have the fantastic classic hit from WWI, "K-K-Katy" (Totally the wrong spelling) by Billy Murray, the Grateful Dead's "Katie Mae", "Katie's Been Gone" by the Band (mmm Rick Danko) and the slightly more modern indie "Katie Come True" by Son Ambulance. However, my favorite Katie song is the one my dad made up for me when I was little: "Katie Bell, your father thinks you are swell!"

Also, I completely missed my two year blogiversary on September 26... whoops. So, a belated happy blogiversary to my blog and to you, the lovely reader, thanks for sticking around :)

J is for...

2007-09-22T11:26:00.000-07:00

Job.

I've been working at my current position for four months, which is mind boggling. My time here has flown by--I've survived my first summer reading program, we've already done two weeks of fall storytimes and I'll be attending next year's summer reading program conference in a month. It is crazy, but definitely in a good way. Because, shocker of all shockers, I really really like my job. See, last week, I started reading a few personal finance and budgeting books (stupid student loans on a public librarian salary) and one of their tips was to see if you really liked your job or if it was time to find either a better paying position or a whole new career. One of the books said that a good way to judge whether or not you liked your job was to see if you got the 6pm Sunday sinking feeling i.e. at the end of the weekend, when you thought about going back to work on Monday, do you want to yak? I don't--not in the least bit. And I'm sure I don't because I've had that feeling in the past, although in my case, it was every night when I got home from work at 6pm. My friend also brought this up when I told her about my financial worries--why don't you find a better paying job? I had a knee-jerk reaction: but I like my job. I don't want to leave.

So, it's official. I like my job. This is crazy to me! I decided I wanted to be a librarian when I was around 16-years-old and more specifically a children's librarian when I was 22! How was I right?! I usually have horrible instincts! And yet, this one was spot on. Let's hope it stays this way.

Finally, one very cute reason why I like my job:
There are a lot of books about sheep not being able to sleep (they inevitably count sheep :)) and while reading these books at our sheep storytime and saying "I wonder why all these sheep can't fall asleep?", a little boy, Auggie, kept shouting out "Maybe they're nocturnal!"

I is for...

2007-09-17T12:41:00.000-07:00

In The Hood

What are your thoughts on the phrase "In The Hood"?

My library's ex is now working in a branch library in Phoenix which is located in a bad part of town. Erika likes to keep all of us updated and I've noticed over the past four or five emails that Erika is OBSESSED with the phrase "In The Hood." She works "in the hood" into almost every sentence. The library "in the hood" is really busy. The kids "in the hood" crave attention. Their library was blasting their air conditioner because it was really warm and there's not a lot of air conditioned buildings "in the hood." We were sent an email with the subject line "water fight in the hood" with pictures of the water fight... in the hood. Another favorite: "I feel like the whitest girl in the hood."

Am I just out of touch (I do live in a diversity-challenged suburb in Wisconsin) or is her obsession with "in the hood" a little weird? Do people use this phrase anymore? And by people, I mean white children's librarians from Wisconsin.

See, I told you "I" would be less whiny :) Thanks for all your nice comments--you guys are the best as usual!

H is for...

2007-09-07T11:10:00.000-07:00

Homesick

Initially, H was going to be for haircuts, hairdressers, home improvement, house guests but obviously I never got around to those. Today, H stands for homesick. I've tried five different ways to explain all of this and none of them are working. So, the whole "flowing paragraphs with transition statements" thing is being scrapped in favor of a modified 5Ws and an H.

What: I'm homesick.

Which home: Madison, the most recent in my long line of homes.

Why: Because I didn't get recognized constantly at the grocery store in Madison. Because I could go out to a bar and get drunk without getting recognized by pretty much anyone. Because if I wanted to get drunk, I wouldn't need to drive half an hour and find a place to sleep to do so. Because I had friends there that I saw on a regular basis. Because I knew where to go in order to be happy. In short, because I was comfortable there.

How did I come to this realization: I was in a bathroom at a bar in Milwaukee. The bar was fantastic in that "is this bar tacky because it's clueless or is it tacky because it's ironic?" kind of way. However, this bar was 40 minutes away from my house and if you needed me to get back there today, I would have no clue how to get there. In short, I have no social life in The Berg because I have no friends there and there's nothing to do there. And I don't have a social life in Milwaukee because it's far away, and to be quite honest, I'm not all that impressed with it. I solemnly believe in that idea that you're either a Madison person or a Milwaukee person. I know I'm a Madison person. I know it's important to make an effort (for my own sanity) to try to be both but when I'm also supposed to be a berg person, the effort just seems exhausting.

So, to sum up, I'm homesick and whiny. I promise "I" will be better.

G is for...

2007-08-20T20:54:00.000-07:00

Guilt
(Sidenote: sorry for all the odd font. Whenever I copy and paste, my font gets wonky.)

I am very good at making myself feel guilty. But when people try to make me feel guilty, I start to feel really really really pissed off. Right now, I'm being made to feel guilty and that is pissing me off. And thus, I am blogging about it (thank god we're on G.... or thank god I'm good at finding a way to make this story about G! :))

Here's the necessary back story. After finding a horrid guy I went to college with on one of my "Your Matches" emails from match.com, my friend Laura suggested I try a different site. Actually, she was much more eloquent about it: "perhaps you should find a different (dare I say better quality?) website to electronically peruse the current dating pool." I decided it couldn't hurt and while I was once again bored one night after work, I began to check out other options (mmm, perhaps I should take the time I spend searching for online dating options and go out and try to meet new people. Huh.)

So, in my mind there are two big online dating sites: match.com and eharmony.com. Truthfully, eharmony scares the crap out of me. Those "This will be!" ads are so "find your soulmate! get married! happily ever after! always and forever!" that it makes me want to stay away from that site forever. But, I caved. And it was a HUGE mistake. Why? Because I am matchless. I am completely and utterly matchless. I freaked, thought "I'm going to be alone forever!" and then went to explore the help section to find out why in god's name I was matchless. Turns out that this is a fairly common experience--sometimes it can take UP TO A YEAR to find a match.

EXCUSE ME?

Why in crap's name am I bothering with online dating (which is supposed to make it easier to meet new people, no?) that might take a year to find me a match? I know eharmony focuses on quality instead of quantity but right now, I just want a date. Right now, perhaps? So I went to delete my profile and cancel my account. I again went to the help section to find out how to delete. The directions were simple and after clicking on "cancel account" that's when I was hit with a massive guilt bomb:

"If you are closing your account because you've met a special person to share your life, on eHarmony or elsewhere, congratulations. If you haven't yet made that connection, I'd like you to consider the following points:

Research shows only 1 in 4 American marriages are actually happy.
Choosing the right mate is the KEY to creating a compatible, loving relationship.
Finding a soul mate on your own and knowing if you're really compatible has never been more confusing or difficult.
eHarmony's proven method of selecting compatible matches has helped create thousands of happy, successful relationships."

See? GUILTGUILTGUILTGUILTGUILT. Actually, that's more threat than guilt. Let me rephrase. THREATTHREATTHREATTHREATTHREATTHREATTHREAT.

It gets better: "Lastly, we really care about your success. There are thousands of online dating services that will offer up hundreds of "matches" based on little more than your favorite hobby. Our goal is completely different. We're helping you find someone to live with and love FOREVER!"

As I said above, I don't deal well with guilt inflicted on me. Particularly by strangers. Particularly by strangers who get paid to pile on the guilt by using the word forever in capital letters.

Also, from what I could tell, eharmony doesn't allow same sex searching i.e if you're gay, it is impossible for you to register at this site. At match.com, there's a drop down menu to select if you are a man looking for a woman or a woman looking for a woman or a woman looking for a man or a man looking for a man. But at eharmony, the drop down menu is: "I'm a man looking for a woman" or "I'm a woman looking for a man." My first thought was "Whhaaaa?" and I probably should have been a little more offended and upset and I probably should have boycotted but I was too busy tunnel visioning my way to a soulmate. So after closing my profile, I googled "eharmony gay" (I'm such a good searcher :)) and I found this article. Granted, it's from USA Today but I still think it's worth looking at. OOooh, after more googling, I found these lovely "Rejected From eHarmony" youtube ads. Sounds like I'm not the only matchless person--perhaps I should try to meet up with one of the other matchless individuals...

Gun, Nerf

To end this entry on a much funnier note, G is also for Gun, Nerf. While attempting to dress up like Carlos, the Cuban Revolutionary brother in Dirty Dancing 2: Havana Nights for Katie C's Dirty Dancing party last weekend, I purchased a nerf gun and became obsessed with it. Then, at the party, at some point during the drunkenness, this happened: our very own Leah, taking target practice with Annie's boyfriend Kellen (the best part is Kellen's face).

F is for...

2007-08-13T15:53:00.000-07:00

Fifty Yard Scream

Every Wednesday, during August, the library has a picnic for the summer reading program participants. Kids bring pack lunches and eat them in the backyard while I read stories. Then after they're done eating, we play games, like Spud, Red Light Green Light, What Time is it Mr. Fox, etc. In an attempt to find more games, I went to a website called Ultimate Camp Resources and found this gem of a game:

"Fifty Yard Scream: Everyone runs screaming and stops when they’ve run out of breath. Then go back and try to beat your score."

I think it's best to pass on this one.

E is for...

2007-08-09T07:53:00.000-07:00

For the last few days I have been stuck on E. I had no clue what to write about and nothing was happening that I could even finagle into an E entry. However, two e's popped up--they're not fun e's but there's e's none the less.

Editor, Letter to the
The local paper comes out on Tuesdays and Thursdays and as of late, every Tuesday and Thursday means that there will be a Letter to the Editor about one of the local libraries. The library down the road is in a mess of trouble--there's high staff turnover, patrons are upset with what they see as poor service and lack of useful materials, and the board and the director (who supposedly is evil and in cahoots with the mayor) is completely in denial that there might be a problem. Now, in theory, this wouldn't affect the library where I work--but it does. Because people are reading all about the problems at this other library and then writing in to say "Oh yeah, all of the libraries in the area are horrible! I once had someone who was rude to me at this library and there was another time at the other library!" This is not good. Not good at all. Our library is in the middle of proposing the budget for next year and we're also trying to get a new library (the drama behind that is a whole nother post all together) and any negative press throws a wrench in our efforts. We're now to the point that our director is telling me to hint to our favorite patrons, our regulars, about the letter to the editor in the hopes that they'll write a favorable one defending our library. I can't do that! And speaking of can't do (or perhaps shouldn't do) I should probably shut my yap--don't want to get dooced.

Evangelism
Yesterday, I thought I was getting asked out by one of my patrons, a 13-year-old girl who I'm pretty sure will someday become a serial killer (she is CREEEEEPY). She asked me if I had plans for Friday night after work. I told her that I was going to Madison (for a dirty dancing party! :)). She said "Oh well, Friday is the start of our parish picnic! We're kicking it all off with an outdoor mass and I was going to invite you! It's going to be a really great service and then there's a rummage sale afterward in the big cow barn."

Luckily, I escaped this one but this isn't the first time I've been asked to go to church and I'm sure it won't be the last. Just about once a week, patrons ask me what religion I am, if I've found a church, if I'd be interested in hearing about their church, if I'd like to go to the contemporary outdoor service at the local Lutheran university with them (that was Bernice, my neighbor downstairs). I hate these questions, mainly because I have huge issues with religion. I was born and raised WELS Lutheran and I went to Lutheran school for 7 years (I could probably write an A-Z series of blogs all about the evilness of Lutheran school). Then, my family transfered to an ELCA Lutheran church where I was pretty happy until about a few years ago. Then, a nice little crisis of faith hit and that's where I find myself now. I don't like organized religion, I don't like the politics of it, I don't like the closed minded nature of traditional Lutheran services but I hate the scary praise-band, stadium seating churches, I don't know what I believe in anymore and I don't want to talk to a professional about so he or she can fix me. And plus, my commitment phobic tendencies about relationships tend to play a part in my issues with religion. The idea of testing out new churches and getting tied down to one that is going to make me uncomfortable, smothered and miserable terrifies the crap out of me. See? Religiously speaking, I'm a mess. And all of this patron pressure is NOT helping. Especially when the patron pressure comes from 13-year-old potential serial killers.

D is for...

2007-08-04T08:15:00.000-07:00

Don Majkowski

*sidenote: I know I'm not being very consistent with my proper nouns. Technically, if I was following my own rules (i.e. Branch, Will), this blog post would be under Majkowski, Don. But, it's my party and I'll be inconsistent if I want to.*

Against my better judgment, I ventured out to one of the local bars last night with my pals Mel and Melissa who wanted to experience the local nightlife. And last night, I was hit on for the first time in my little town by a 30 year old guy originally from Boston, complete with a wicked thick Boston accent. Our suitor explained that he had recently relocated and that he was well-read and quite a catch (if you say you're a catch, you're usually not). He then started drilling me with questions (some examples: "where's your boyfriend?" "You're wearing a lot of yellow. Are you wearing underwear? And if so, is it yellow?"). Then, after explaining why he was such a catch and peppering me with questions, he finally asked me if I would like to ask him a question. This was my first mistake. I should have said NO. But, I'm an idiot. And then I proceeded to have one of the most frustrating conversations I've had in a while:

Me: You're wearing a Brewers hat but you're from Boston. Do you like the Red Sox?
Dude: See, I love the Red Sox but I grew up watching Wisconsin sports so I'm more of a Brewers guy. Do you like sports?
Me: Yes.
Dude: What's your favorite?
Me: Football.
Dude: I used to watch the Packers all the time when I was growing up! I'm such a fan! When I was younger, and I'm a lot older than you, I used to LOOOOOVE their quarterback. The one they had before Favre.
Me: Don Majkowski.
Dude: No, that wasn't it.
Me: Yeah it was. Majkowski. Majik Man.
Dude: I don't think so. Man, why can't I remember his name?
Me: Majkowski. Number 7. Don Majkowski.
Dude: Was it? I don't know.
Me: Blonde mullet. I had a t-shirt. I wore it to my first Packer game. It's probably still sitting in my mom and dad's basement.
Dude: I still don't think that's it. Whatever. God, the Packers were so great in the 80s.
Me: Actually, they were pretty horrible.
Dude: I used to remember watching them play on that baseball diamond.
Me: County Stadium.
Dude: They don't do that much anymore.
Me: At all, actually. Because they knocked down County Stadium to build Miller Park.
Dude: That's where they played? Are you sure?
Me: Yup.
Dude: County Stadium was a great place to watch a baseball game. I've only been there once--back in 2002.
Me: Yeah, that's sort of impossible. *Miller Park opened in 2001*
Dude: It felt really historic you know? I will never forget that.

And so on and so forth. He eventually started talking about golf and explaining ball markers to me (I played golf in high school. I know about ball markers. I told him this. He still explained). Then he explained how he was well-read... it involved lots of John Grisham novels. Then he chastised me for not reading Grisham. It was frustrating on so many levels. I hate it when people don't listen to me. I know I was being a bit of a know-it-all just to spite him but wouldn't you? My mother continuously tells me that I'm single because men are intimidated by me. But, I just have a low tolerance for idiots who think too highly of themselves and I will punish them severely with the help of sarcasm, smarty-pants-ness, and evasiveness. I don't think that's intimidation--it's probably just bitchiness.

C is for...

2007-07-31T12:56:00.000-07:00

Crush.

One of my New Years Resolutions was to have a crush on a boy *I'm truly a driven individual* Well, I did have a nice little crush in Madison... someone I knew wouldn't ever work out but who was cute and helped me forget about (and also get back at) 5 Months Later Boy. And who knows, perhaps it could have worked, if there was more time... but, he's back in Madison and I'm living in my little town where there is a serious lack of testosterone.

My current place of resident is occupied by lots and lots of young married couples with little kids. This is good for my career but bad for my personal life. I've become the queen of checking out the ring finger. I know this town can't be completely devoid of single men but they must be really good at hiding. Because of this, I've become the 7th grade version of myself i.e. "I have a crush on every boy!"(watch out there's sound!) Really, every single semi-attractive (okay, he doesn't even have to be attractive) who crosses my path automatically gets put in the crush file. This is very dangerous.... and rather depressing too.

So I was back in Madison over the weekend and was faced with the reality of my singleness. Madison is crawling with cute boys. And unfortunately I saw 5 Months Later Boy briefly so that was also a nice reminder of how truly single I am and also an redundant reminder of how big of a jerk he is/was. Later in the night, Caroline and I were drinking at her place and Katy, my old roommate, and our friend Kelly stopped by. We started talking about boys and the lack thereof in my life and Katy's potential new suitor. Then, I mentioned the pact that was informally made between Katy and I: if neither of us met anyone "special" by September, we would join match.com together. I really don't want to join, not because I'm against online dating but instead because I'm terrified of relationships and by extension of online dating. I told the girls this (or at least I think I did... who knows with the alcohol) and Caroline told me that I could create a profile for free, hide the profile and look around to see if anyone looked interesting.

And that is exactly what I did. I had about 32 pages of matches--some who seemed nice, some who had poor grammar (what's the point of punctuation anyway!?), some who seemed pretty damn snobby and full of themselves and some who were downright dreamy. None of the matches have spurred me to join and give this online dating thing a chance. But one particular match did make me cackle and laugh for a good half an hour. His name? LoveInTights. His tagline? My Love is Harder Than a Steel Chair.

And for the rest of the hilarious details, I'm going to just quote him... I don't think I could do him justice:

About Me and Who I'm Looking For
PRO-WRESTLER SEEKS LOVE OF HIS LIFE! Ladies, allow me to introduce myself... My name is *Name Omitted to Protect the Ridiculous*. Currently I'm living in Grafton, Wisconsin in an apartment with my unemployed roomate Doug (Doug says hi!). As of right now, I work during the day at Jordan & Johnson Co. in New Berlin making toliet (sic) paper, but my true passion is wrestling in front of crowds. Something about the battle of good vs. evil with all the sweat, grit and tights involved just gets me all pumped up! As for my type of date, I'm looking for a woman who knows what she wants in life. She has to have a good outlook on life, even when the chips are down, and can always lift anyone's spirits! I'm hoping I can meet somone who loves people and life just as much as me. Also, No need for women with drug problems, please (my last date stole all my painkillers and my roommates prescription pills). *Skip ahead to last sentence* So ladies, I'm dieing (sic) to hear from you! P.S. Dont call me at work though, my boss Mr. Jarvis will be super mad!

My religion:
I like religion. I think if people dont have it, then its their lost. But hey, thats their call. All I know is after a really hard day at the gym, or after a tough match, I like to open my religious book, and read religious things.

My education:
Its kinda funny. I had been accepted into University of Ohio, but I rejected and took up my true passion of wrestling. I graduated from "Killer Kowalski's School of Wrestling" in 2005 *It exists!*. Since then, I've been on a quest to conquer the wrestling world!

I've decided it's a bit imprudent to post his picture but I wish you could see him. He's wearing a white bandanna and shinny silver leggings. Oh and he's also sporting a soul patch. And he's flexing his "guns." Now, there are two options with this profile: either he is serious and I can continue laughing or he's trying to be funny and then I have to stop laughing and consider why a 24-year-old would waste time and money making such a dumb profile.

Needless to say, I did not join match.com and I don't know if I'll be joining in September. In the meantime, I'm going to concentrate on finding my crushes the old fashioned way--now, what the old fashioned way is, I'm not entirely sure.

B is for...

2007-07-25T08:23:00.001-07:00

Branch, Will:
One of the best things about being a librarian is the librarian crush. No, I'm not talking about the crushes patrons have on librarians (those are generally creepy)--I'm talking about the crushes librarians have on authors, musicians, etc. Me personally, I have a children's librarian crush on Kevin Henkes (of course, who doesn't), Jack Prelutsky (this is also a childhood crush and stems back from the line "'Interception!' Daddy roars and once again the wrong team scores" in It's Thanksgiving!), Louis Sachar (I loooove the Wayside School books) and Norton Juster.

I now have a new librarian crush and his name is Will Branch, half of the musical duo Fox and Branch, who came to perform at our library today. Will is fun, he's funny, he's nice, he's easy going, he's great with kids, he's cute, he's tall, he has a great name (just say a few times. Will Branch. Nice, right?) and he plays the banjo. What's not to love? I liked their program so much that when I found out they were playing tonight at the library down the road, I was more than tempted to go to that show too. But then I think I would crossing into librarian stalker territory.

Bike Race:
Yesterday, I went to a bike race.... because I had to. I was trapped at the bike race. Because not only does my current place of residence love fests, they also love bike races... oh wait they call it the annual international cycling classic. And they love having them downtown, where I work and also where I get my haircut. This race is a circuit race (I think that's what it's called--although I have no clue what I'm talking about) so they have to block off a big mile long square in the downtown area. After I got done with work, I walked over to get my haircut and then realized that my car was parked inside of the loop instead of outside. And thus, I was trapped. So I gave up trying to leave and instead went to Sal's Pizza for a slice of roasted vegetable pizza (almost as good as Ian's...almost) and found a spot to stand to watch the race. I've never watched a bike race before but it was so awesome! They're flying past at about 30 miles an hour and they're biking mere inches away from you. It was terrifying and completely amazing. And it took place in the town where I live--it's still crazy that in this small town there's almost always something fun to do. I just have to leave my house and actually go.

Bernice:
So last night I got trapped at a bike race. This morning I locked myself out of my apartment. Woot! I'm on such a roll. I blame the library. See, we have these ugly bright orange "Get a Clue @ your library" t-shirts that we have to wear every Wednesday for our special events. I washed mine last night but didn't have the time to dry it before I went to bed. So I put it on a hanger in front of the window and hoped it would dry by morning. And of course it didn't. So this morning, I took a shower, threw on some clothes and went downstairs to put it in the dryer for a quick spin. And didn't bring my keys and locked my poor dumb little self out. Then, I FREAKED OUT. Had visions of being both late for work AND not having time to have any coffee (that's how you know you have a problem). So, I knew that our groundskeeper dude lived somewhere on the first floor and started knocking on doors, in that scary frantic way that would freak me out if I woke up to it. Thank god for Bernice. Not only does she not play shitty covers of Led Zeppelin at 2:30am, she was awake and not offended that I would be knocking frantically and freaking out like a little immature kid. She told me to call the landlady's daughter and let me use her phone--actually, she dialed the number for me, which made me feel like a 5 year old but not necessarily in a bad way. Luckily, the landlady's daughter lives in the building next door and she was up getting her kids ready for vacation bible school (sidenote: everyone in this town is constantly going to some form of VBS.) And I made it to work on time and even had time to stop for coffee. Yikes.

A is for...

2007-07-23T15:38:00.000-07:00

I have two books that are always sitting on my bedside table: Bridget Jones's Diary by Helen Fielding and Encyclopedia of an Ordinary Life by Amy Krouse Rosenthal. Let's talk about the later for a second. I would consider this book one of my favorite books because it is just so brilliant. The book is literally an encyclopedia of this woman's life--a woman who describes herself as ordinary (even though she's totally not). She writes about her life, her husband, her kids, her friends, but she also writes about ordinary life and she's pretty much always dead-on. Not in a Seinfeld, gimmicky, hahaahaha-kind of way but in a "wow, you're right, you're totally right" kind of way, like the small pleasure of putting a Q-tip in your ear, the fear of introducing your friends and having them like each other more than they like you, and how easy it is to not do something than it is to do something. In short, it is brilliant--you should all read it. I'm totally not doing it justice.

So, in honor of this lovely book and because my life has become pretty damn ordinary, I'm going to channel my inner Amy Krouse Rosenthal and write a series of alphabetical blogs. It's not really going to be very encyclopedia-esque, more like those "A is for Apple" kids books.

So, to start at the beginning (a very good place to start), A is for 'Arry and Art.

'Arry *said in a jaunty British accent i.e. Harry*
Julia requested an update and since all of you were so darn supportive, it's the least I could do. The Harry Potter Party was on Saturday afternoon and we had 17 participants. My coworker who helped me plan it in less than 8 days said that she was shooting for 20 but that 17 was more than good. And the people who did show up seemed very very pleased and I think everyone had a great time. I wish there would have been a few more people but all in all, I was proud of the party. We planned it at the last minute and all for under $30 but we had cool activities like wands out of pretzel rods, frosting and sprinkles, a sorting hat made out of a paper bag, Weasley is Our King crowns and Harry Potter pipe cleaner glasses.

And the book? I really liked it. I'm sad it's done but I think she did a great job ending it. And that's all I'm going to say.

Art
A is also for art. As of late, art has become pertinent. I'm trying to decorate my apartment--which has become a struggle to say the least. Finding reasonably priced artwork is very often impossible (although I will be attending the Mount Mary Starving Artists Show). It's even more impossible when you don't know what you like or where you would hang it or if it's worth the cost when sometimes you'd just like to hang up a framed picture of "Starry Night" just to get it over with (I'm only slightly kidding).

It's also been coming up in conversation... Over the weekend, while having dinner at my cousin's house, I was asked (by said cousin): "Katie, do you like art?" *Duhn Duhn DUhhhhhhnnn* I hate questions like this. They're so loaded. Really, this question is a prime example of the second sentence question... like they should be saying "I hate art. Katie do you like art?" or "I love art. Katie, do you like art?" I don't think anyone asks those questions if they don't have an opinion already. My cousin would be on the side of "I hate art or more specifically art and art museums and galleries are a waste of time." And I knew this. I answered with a babbled response talking about how I didn't really understand it but that I liked going to museums but that I rarely actually went. That's the truth, technically speaking. I know nothing about art but I really like museums and galleries too but never seem to actually go to them....

...until recently! This Friday, I'm going to Gallery Night with my friend and old roommate Mel (Hi Mel!) and her friends. I'm quite excited about it but I'm also not-so-secretly hoping that no one asks me what I think. Eek.

Dislikes. No Likes.

2007-07-19T09:06:00.000-07:00

Originally, this post was going to be Likes and Dislikes: The Library Edition. But, I couldn't come up with any likes. Yes, it's been a long day. And it's 11:15am.

Dislikes:

-The Three J's (Jacob, Jack and James) who all come to 10am storytime and make my life MISERABLE. James can't not throw a tantrum. Jacob and Jack can't stand each other and whenever they're together, they push each other and scream a lot.... during storytime.

-Jacob and Jack's mothers who still plan playdates together despite the fact that their kids hate one another.

-Play Dates. In general. Baah.

-Jerk Business Man Dad hanging out with his kids and doing business deals on his cell phone in the middle of the children's department.

-Jerk Business Man Dad rolling his eyes at you when you tell him that cell phone calls are only allowed in the lobby

-Also, Jerk Business Man Dad thinking he can pull off wearing madras pants and a striped polo.

-Sharing the storytime space (i.e. the back room in the library) with the adult sci-fi, large type and western books, as well as the YA titles AND the Friends Book Sale. Claustrophobia is setting in.

-CDs for Kids. At every storytime, the kids get percussion instruments and make an unholy amount of noise along with a song relating to the storytime theme. Trying to find songs that relate to themes and aren't the lamest and most annoying things EVER CREATED is nearly impossible. All of the CDs I've come across are horrid, particularly the Toddlers Sing albums. I thought it would be a CD with Sing-a-long songs for toddlers. Nope, it's literally toddlers singing. I'd rather bash my head into the wall. I know there are exceptions to the rule--School Library Journal has a whole long article about the 12 Kids' Albums You Can't Live Without, including one containing a song called "For Those About to Walk (We Salute You). *pretty awesome* But, today, I choose to ignore these facts and focus on the negative. Bah humbug.

You Gotta Fight! For Your Right! To Potter!***

2007-07-13T11:47:00.000-07:00

When I found out that the last Harry Potter book was coming out in the summer of 2007 (i.e. the year I would in theory have a real job as a children's librarian), I was so so so excited. I'm a huge Harry fan and I loved the idea of having the excitement of the new book in the library, promoting the book, reading for myself and discussing it with my patrons and most importantly, throwing a big huge party to celebrate the event. And when I found out that I had a job, I was even more excited! My dreams would become a reality!

Then, I arrived at my new job and realized that my dreams would probably not become a reality. There were four large problems: 1) lack of money 2) lack of time to plan 3) lack of people 4) lack of support (the director places more importance on someone sitting at the desk, answering questions). So I resigned myself to the fact that I wouldn't get my long anticipated Harry Potter party. I did some inner pouting and debating back in forth between "Eh, it doesn't really matter. Besides, there's no time" and "But it's the last one! Ever! This is your last chance!" But I kept my mouth shut.

Then, we put up a promotional display with a Harry Potter countdown, with a little tear off calendar proclaiming how many days until Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. It was making me a little crazy but I just ignored it. Then people started seeing the sign and asking if were doing anything. And then I had to say, "No, we're not planning anything. There's a midnight event at the bookstore downtown though!" And it was breaking my heart to say it.

So, on Wednesday (a mere 10 days before the release), I told my coworker (who works part time in the kids department and helps with the storytime load) that I thought we needed a Harry Potter Party. Well, actually, I think I said, "People keep asking if we're having a party for the release of Harry Potter and I think we should. I really want to have a party. I promise it won't be too much work. Would you mind helping?" She seemed okay with me dumping a massive amount of work on her and we brought it to the director. I pleaded, told her it would be very low key and very very very cheap.

She said yes and the wheels started in motion! My coworker and I had a Harry Potter party meeting yesterday. We planned some fun activities, tested out the crafts (such as Harry glasses using pipe cleaners, making Dumbledore puppets with lunch bags and making Weasley is Our King crowns), made a shopping list for the food items (Butterbeer i.e. cream soda and magic wands i.e. pretzel rods with frosting and jimmies) and I even wrote a press release to send to the newspaper.

I hope it's not a huge flop. I'm praying it's not a huge flop. This is the first time I've stuck my neck out at this job and I'm just hoping it's not too last minute for a good crowd to show up and prove my instincts right.

***And yes, I'm very proud of this title.

Out of the Mouths of Babes: 10:30am

2007-07-10T09:02:00.000-07:00

"I don't want to read that! There's a girl on the cover! Girls are yuuuuucky!"
-7 year old boy

"*ear piercing scream*"
-3 year old boy

"Last night I was watching Harry Potter and he turned into a FISH!"
-8 year old boy

"Sometimes police officers kill themselves because they want to die and go to heaven."
-A very strange 11 year old girl

"I want to go to storytiiiime"
"But honey, your storytime isn't until Thursday!"
"But I waaaaaannnnnaaaaa *sob sob*"
-four year old boy and his mom (and yes, he was talking about my storytime... i feel a "booya!" is in order.)

Items of Note

2007-07-04T20:48:00.000-07:00

So, once again, it's been a while but it's not because I'm not thinking of you. I have nine (9!!!) posts saved on my blogger account which I didn't post because they were all boring/whiny/dooce-worthy. So, I've looked at all of the posts and found some reasonably interesting items to post about.

*The last time I saw my next door neighbor, he was wearing hunting camouflage and carrying a riffle holder. I saw him on 4th of July with his girlfriend. He was wearing camo and they were BOTH carrying hunting bows. Obviously they are a match made in heaven... I expect that when I next see them they will be pushing a cannon.

*This is completely random but I had a Giada De Laurentiis moment today. I was sitting at my desk, cutting out paper ice cream scoops for my storytime and eavesdropping on a little boy playing with the train set. He picked up one of the wooden barges and yelled out "Look Mom! It's a gondola!" I snickered but kept it together, continuing to cut out my ice cream. I realized though that I was continuing to smile while cutting. How does this relate to Giada? Well, my least favorite part of Everyday Italian is when she is cutting/chopping/cooking/plating while smiling her big scary smile. It just feels really fake and pretty darn creepy. So, I stopped smiling and put a more stern librarian face on while cutting. Because I'm sure that's not creepy either.

*Speaking of stern librarians, I made a little boy cry on Tuesday. An 8-year-old boy. (I'm used to making wee little babies cry... I have a gift it seems) We didn't have a book he wanted (some spiderman book) and he burst into tears. We are talking inconsolable weeping. Luckily, we have about a thousand Spiderman books so I found other options for him. However, I think this is a very good example of the power of books... or perhaps there is something wrong with him.

*Last night I pulled into my parking lot after coming home from a movie (Waitress, which was quite good but a little too easily wrapped up) and I was getting rid of some "I eat my breakfast on the way to work" trash in my car. I walked over to the apartment complex garbage bin and there was a guy doing the exact same thing. At first (in all my agoraphobic glory) I thought "Oh god, there's someone. Eek, I might have to talk to him. Maybe I should turn around." But, I was already on my way so I kept walking. He threw his stuff in and then held open the dumpster for me. I said thanks and he asked if I lived at our apartment complex and if I knew how the recycling worked. I said I did and explained the whole "paper in one bin, everything else in the other." He said "Thanks" and I said "You're Welcome" and I WALKED AWAY. Didn't try to engage this very nice person in conversation... just walked away and then thought "Oh my god, that was rude and silly of you!" Here's what I've realized: before seeing this guy, I have not had a conversation with someone who didn't have to talk to me since I moved to Cedarburg. I've only talked to people who were patrons, coworkers, baristas/waiters/salespeople/fitness trainers. It's wacky! And depressing! And yet, when a person does try to talk to me, what do I do? I WALK AWAY! (My strange little brain just cued up the chorus of Kelly Clarkson's "Walk Away")

I'm sick of writing about work...

2007-06-22T11:08:00.001-07:00

...so you're getting a meme since I don't quite have a life outside of work yet. I saw this on the internets and I'm making it my own.

Who was your first love?
Chad, who was also my first real friend. We met in preschool and formed the "High Top Club"--of course you could only be a member if you had high tops. (Mine were Punky Brewster.) I loved him so much that I wanted to spend all of my time with him. But, we only had preschool part of the week so on the days I wasn't at school, I had my imaginary friend, Chad... which created lots of confusion. Which Chad heard that story? Which Chad was playing London Bridges with me? He had the coolest parents too--his mom was a policewoman and his dad worked for an educational toy company (Chad had lots of cool learning friendly toys) and his dad looked like Dave Grohl in the Foo Fighter's Monkey Wrench video (I figured that out as a teenager). We went to the same elementary school until second grade when he went to public school and I stayed in private school. But, in an interesting twist of fate, we went to the same high school and in my 14 year old nostalgic mind, he was as cute as ever. He heard about my infatuation and told his mom he was going to ask me to the homecoming dance. She (get this!) told him that he was too immature and I was too nice to go with an immature boy like him. He didn't ask me. I'm still pretty darn pissed off with his mom for that one. He's now married... to a 40 year old... who's been divorced twice and has a son who's 19 (we're 24!). I'm not trying to be judgmental but come on.

Who was your first kiss and when?
I'm going to be vague. I was in college (I was terrified of boys all through high school... oh wait, I'm still terrified of them) and it was someone I should not have been kissing... so much so that I started laughing in the midst of it. His tongue hit my teeth. I'm mortified just thinking about it.

Who was your first prom date?
Andy. This one was a doozy. He was my ex-best friend's ex-boyfriend--and we became ex-best friends while she was dating him. And at the time, my friend (a different friend!) was in love with him and he was asking for her advice about asking me and trying to date me. I wanted nothing to do with him--because of the whole ex-best friend's ex-boyfriend thing. And of course, I didn't know that my friend liked him so I was spouting how uninterested I was (she told me years later that she was really trying hard not to hate me during all of that). But, he asked me in a really sweet way--my favorite fruit is the beautiful banana so he spelled out PROM? in bananas on my front porch. The dot on the question mark was a pineapple with a note from him. And hell if I was going to miss my first prom. We went and I tried very very carefully to avoid his amorous intentions i.e. feeling up my leg while we were dancing. It was pretty horrid but I had a great dress (black strapless--something I would still wear to this day) and I had loaves of banana bread hanging out in my freezer for months.

Who was your first roommate?
Rebecca i.e. Becca i.e. Rebs i.e. Berecca She was my freshman year roommate and we stayed together for a second year. She was Interesting (with a capital I) and Unique and Cute and Little and even though we got along really well, I always felt either not cool enough or jealous of her coolness. But, it was still a really good experience--considering we got randomly put together freshmen year.

What was your first job?
Cashier at the high school indoor pool. I hung out with a lot of swimmers in high school who all became lifeguards and all went to work at the pool. I didn't want to be left out but couldn't swim worth a darn. Thus, I became the pool's cashier and became very good at making change.

What was your first car?
Scooty McDrive, a 1992 white stick shift Saturn. I bought it with my own money, paid car insurance for it, decorated it with all of the bumper stickers I had been saving up for years and it died 7 months later. We replaced the engine (MISTAKE! HUGE MISTAKE!) and it continued to die during inopportune moments. It was so traumatic--that piece of shit broke my heart.

When did you go to your first funeral?
Sadly, I've been going to funerals all my life. The first significant one was my paternal grandfather's funeral when I was in kindergarten. I don't remember a lot about it but I do remember the wake and the fact that it smelled like flowers and tears (I'm still not sure how I came up with tears.) I couldn't handle being in the room (and my mom was too busy taking care of my dad who was a mess) so I went with my cousin and sat in the funeral home's kitchen.

How old were you when you first moved away from your hometown?
18 I suppose.... when I moved to the dorms

Who was your first-grade teacher?
Miss Gray. In true parochial school form, she was mean and horrible. At the time I liked her but looking back on it, she shouldn't have done a lot of the things she did... like duct taping a kid's hands to his desk for an entire afternoon so he stopped fidgeting.

When you snuck out of the house for the first time, who was it with?
Me? Sneak out of the house? Ha! Never! (No, really, I'm not being sarcastic.) Not only did I never sneak out of the house, I thought never even occurred to me.

Who was the first person to send you flowers?
My parents. My mom looooves sending flowers. So much so that whenever I move anywhere, she immediately finds a local florist... just in case.

When was the first time you got drunk?
Spring semester of my freshmen year of college. My friend had a bottle of Amaretto and I had some Capri Sun juice pouches. Five girls from my floor and I played Asshole with shots of Amaretto with a Capri Sun chaser. Disgusting and hilarious! When I got "sobered" up, I felt incredibly guilty and began emailing my high school friends (who were nondrinkers with me back in high school) about the horrible thing I had done. Turns out, they had all basically done the same.

What was the first thing you did this morning?
Hit the snooze button, realized I was cold and happily pulled my down comforter up and snuggled in. Then finally got up and rushed rushed rushed so I wouldn't be late for work.

I Can't Feel My Hands

2007-06-15T12:04:00.000-07:00

It's been four weeks since I started my job and I've realized that I've become a somewhat settled person. I make myself dinner (last night I roasted vegetables and made polenta!), I pack myself lunch (leftover veggies and polenta!), I clean my apartment on a regular basis and I'm going to bed at 11pm every night, which is very very early for me. I don't have many friends (many? err, any) so when I get done with work, I go home, make dinner, read a book, clean up my kitchen, watch some tv, watch the local news (and develop a crush on the dreamy sports guy) and go to bed.

Now that I am settled, I can focus my attentions and my obsessive thoughts on the things that really matter in life--like my office chair. My office chair weighs heavily on my mind for a good five hours a day. The problem? I cannot for the life of me, find a way to sit in it and be comfortable. It's not like I'm new to the "sit on a chair for 8 hours" game; I spent every summer during college sitting at a desk, starring at a computer and taking customer service calls every day. But, those were the really nice, big comfy chairs, much like this:
However, that was a big, important company who could afford nice, big comfy chairs. I now work in an underfunded library. My office chair now looks like this:
There are lots of levers and knobs but I have no idea how I'm supposed to be angling the seat or adjusting the height of the seat or the backrest or changing the angle on the backrest so that my arms and hands stop going numb and my shoulders stop aching. I'm kind of obsessed right now... I've googled "Proper chair alignment" (and found a handy spine website!). I've adjusted the seat so that it's on a downward angle (which is supposedly helpful but really just makes me worry I'm going to slide out of my chair). I've even started using the ridiculous, large plastic footrest that my predecessor left under her desk. I am constantly shifting around, rolling my shoulders back at the desk, stretching in the staff room.... Nothing is helping. Perhaps I need a pillow? Or perhaps I am too tall for my chair and need a different chair. Maybe I should try an exercise ball.

Or maybe I should find something more interesting to write on my blog. I bet you guys are just clamoring for those blog entries about guys who are jerks, aren't you? Well, I apologize. My interest is now on jerk chairs. Not to be confused with jerk chicken...

God I need to get a life.

The Ex

2007-06-07T07:01:00.000-07:00

I've decided that being the new gal at the library is kind of like being the new girlfriend and part of being the new girlfriend is meeting all of your significant other's friends (i.e. new patrons, even staff members.) And slowly, as the relationship progresses and you start getting to know the friends, you start to learn about the one who came before you, like this dude's ex-girlfriend. You can find out if this ex girlfriend was a psychopath, a complete sweetheart, a bitch, a heart breaker who left him just a shell of a man, etc.

When I interviewed for the job, I was told that Miss Erika was dating a guy who lived in Arizona and he kept sending her job ads and finally she applied for one, got it, gave her two weeks and is now probably sweating her butt off. She had been working at the library for about six years and started right out of grad school. A good amount of information but still, not very helpful. Well, I've been in my new relationship for about three weeks and slowly but surely I am learning about Miss Erika i.e. the library's ex. I've heard about her from patrons and even the school librarian I visited yesterday and I've compiled what I've learned in a handy dandy list.

1) She has a massive amount of stickers (really, like three drawers full) and she would let the wee ones take them all out and choose which one they wanted, which would of course take a significant amount of time. One parent said, "It's a new era. Do what you want but please just give them one, otherwise we'll be here all day."

2) According to the school librarian at the elementary school I visited yesterday, if you gave her 30 minutes for a presentation, she would take all 30 minutes. As the school librarian pointed out, at times it was painful... particularly when she had about 20 minutes of material and she was talking to kindergarten classes.

3) She kept a bottle of bubbles in her desk drawer and she would blow bubbles at the kids on request.

4) This one is a doozy--so odd that I felt compelled to write this entry. A little girl named Grace came in this morning with her mom and kept saying "Copy" to me. "Copy copy copy" (although at first it sounded like she was saying "Coffee" and I was thinking "Yes, Coffee. Gooood Coffee.") and I looked at her mom, kind of puzzled. So her mom explains to me that Miss Erika used to let her daughter make copies of coloring sheets with the copy machine. Her daughter is 3 years old... Whhhhaaaaaaaaaaaa? This is weird, right? And really not a good idea when you think about it, right? Or am I just being a curmudgeon?

This *gestures to above numbered list* is worrisome. These tactics seemed to go over well. Miss Erika was well-liked (to pull a Willie Loman). It's also worrisome because that isn't at all my style. And I don't want it to be my style. I'm not the bubble blowing type, just like I am not the seasonal sweater, cat themed jumper wearing kind of gal. And I do not think it's fun or appropriate to let a three year old use a very expensive piece of office equipment as a toy. (Wow, curmudgeon alert!) I can be a good children's librarian despite that, though, right? I can be well-liked too, right? Eeekk.

Working Stiff

2007-06-06T17:15:00.001-07:00

Yikes, it's been a long time, hasn't it? Sorry!!! First of all, thank you guys so much for all of the kind comments and putting up with my whining and worrying. You guys made me feel much better about everything and I definitely survived the move and first few days because of it.

Now, regarding my life in this new city. Basically my life can be separated into two categories: Work and Not Work. Let's start with work.

So far, so good. I know that's vague but it's the best way to describe it. At this point, I really like my job. I like most of my patrons and my coworkers are great... at least 15-20 years older than me, but great. And I feel like I'm doing a good job at my job. When I was talking to my mom after my first week and I told her that so far, everything was fine, she said, "I'm shocked that you're not miserable... you're supposed to be miserable and overwhelmed for the first few months." Here's the thing, there isn't any programs going on and I haven't learned anything about selecting, ordering or budgeting. But here's what happens in the next three months: School lets out this Friday and the average number of people in the children's room will increase by leaps and bounds. Registration starts for the summer reading program this Saturday. We'll have programs every Wednesday and then massive crowds in the children's room. Then, in July, I have four storytimes for 3-5 year olds and I need to prepare those and also prepare crafts-50 for each week. And I'm the one who gets to cut out all of the pieces for said crafts. Then, in August, I get to host picnics every Wednesday with stories for all ages and games. So, right now, my job is great. As I told my mom, talk to me in July and see how I'm feeling.

But, like I was saying before, right now, I'm great. I'm having a ton of fun getting to know all my little ones and today I did my very first school visit. It was an exhausting blast. I did a summer reading program presentation for an elementary school in town. The theme of the summer reading program is "Get a Clue @ your library" (unfortunately not @ your library, bitches :)) so I wore a trench coat (borrowed from the assistant director's husband) and a ridiculous Sherlock Holmes-esque hat and I carried a little flip top notebook. And of course, the kids got to help me solve "mysteries" i.e. "How do you keep a skunk from smelling?" (Plug his nose :)). And I had a powerpoint presentation to tell them the ins and outs of the program and then I did booktalks. Again, exhausting but a total blast. My favorite part of the day was with the 2nd and 3rd graders. They were the biggest group and yet they were the best listeners. They had just received their yearbooks and after my presentation, they were all going to gym (which was next door) to have their teachers sign their yearbooks. And, get this! They wanted me to sign their yearbooks!!!! It was SO COOL. So I was signing things like "Reading Rocks! Miss Katie" "Keep Reading! Miss Katie" and the classic "Have a great summer... @ the library! Miss Katie" Soooooo fun :) It's really hard not to love your job when little kids are asking for you autograph :)

In other work related news, I now understand why people drink coffee when they go to work. For my first five days of work, I stayed away from all things caffeine but then I slept like crap on Tuesday night and stopped at Starbucks on Wednesday morning (and the barista was so cute!). Then I busted out my coffee machine Thursday and made myself what I think was probably a pretty strong cup o' joe. And since then, I've had some form of caffeine every morning. Holy shit it's amazing how much more I get done! I'm sitting at my desk, all perky, ready to work and even though my attention span is about two seconds long, it is so much easier making it through the morning! I'm doing that peppy, cheery, children's librarian thing--if you threw a apple themed jumper on me, I'd be your stereotypical kiddie librarian!

Now, onto the not work section of this entry (which is getting quite long... are you guys asleep yet?)

I love my apartment. I really do. I'm slowly but surely getting settled (just ignore the seven or so unpacked boxes in my spare room). I've got curtains up in my living room and coordinating pillows. It's great--I promise I'll post pictures soon. I feel at home there and And it's a good thing because I never leave it. As expected, my social life is desolate. To quote one of my co-workers, "So, you don't know anyone here? Well, good luck meeting anyone." She speaks the truth. I have no idea how to meet anyone.

Actually, I've met quite a few people--they're just middle aged. Now, I like middle aged people. As an only child who spent most of her time hanging out with grownups, I like middle aged people but these people are not middle aged in a fun way. They're middle aged in a "Oh my daughter, she's so liberal. They're all liberal when they go to college" way. This afternoon, I met a woman who lives in my apartment complex and she was talking about how horrible our apartment complex was and how nothing ever got fixed and at first I was worried and then I realized that she has never lived in Madison so our standards are a bit different (my apartment is beautiful, pristine even.) Then she told me that there was a librarian named Dan who lived upstairs in her building. First thought "A manbrarian!" Second thought: "Ugh, a manbrarian." But, she did tell me about the Cultural Center... which has events like "Backyard Bijou" where they show movies like Pillow Talk, Viva Las Vegas and Charade in the backyard of a historic house in town. I will definitely be attending Backyard Bijou events. Living in this uppity little city (I speak the truth.) has its advantages.

Happy Trails....

2007-05-21T10:41:00.001-07:00

Well, I am officially a librarian! *throws imaginary mortarboard up in air* Yay me!

Of course, that also means that I officially start my grown up librarian job tomorrow. And that means that I am freaking out. I don't want to be a grown up anymore. I don't want to leave Madison. I don't want to leave my friends. I certainly don't want the responsibility of running a children's department. Who the hell thought I was qualified to do that!? Jesus!

Now, I could post a long diatribe filled with freaking out, weepiness and cliched sentiment. I've actually got about three posts saved on my account all about that but I'm not going to post that. Those posts are under the "Letters you write but never send because you don't want to look crazy" file. So instead, I'm going to write about my favorite method of coping: mixes. I am the queen of mixes and now that I have an iPod I can make mixes for every occasion. For example, I have a "Not corny, classic" mix with all of my favorite swinging hits from the 1960s, a mix titled "Naparu" with all of my favorite sleeping hits like "Julia" by The Beatles and a "Get Down" mix with classics like "Genius of Love" by the Tom Tom Club. There's also the therapeutic mixes like "So Long *Five Months Later Boy* including "Since U Been Gone" by Kelly Clarkson (seriously, what did scorned women do before Kelly?) and "I'm Gonna Wash That Man Right Out of My Hair" by Ella Fitzgerald. So when the freaking out started, I of course made a mix titled "So Long Farewell" (a little shout out to my girl Julie Andrews):

1) "Bye, Bye Baby (Baby Goodbye) by The Four Seasons. Sure, Frankie and the boys are saying goodbye to a girl but it works for a town too, right?

2) "Fairest of the Seasons" by Nico. I love this song, and the line "I'd be leaving in the fairest of the seasons" seems particularly pertinent since I am of course moving away from Madison during the best time to live here.

3) "Leaving on a Jet Plane" by Peter, Paul and Mary. Oh John Denver, you tug at my heart strings. And Mary? You are so perfectly mournful I want to have your babies.

4) "Mother of God" by Patty Griffin. All for one line: "So I'm wearing my footsteps into this floor. One day I won't live here anymore and someone will wonder who lived here before and went on their way."

5) "Leaving Las Vegas" by Sheryl Crow. Before the duets wtih Kid Rock and the hair dye commercials, Sheryl Crow was putting out decent albums. This one is a gimme.

6) "The Only Living Boy in New York" by Simon and Garfunkel. If I could, I would put this song on every mix that I make (wait, I do.) There's a travel theme so it was included on this one.

7) "Sloop John B" by The Beach Boys. This one talks about home. Of course, I have no clue where home actually is anymore. Well, wherever it is, "I feel so broke up, I want to go home."

8) "The Long and Winding Road" by The Beatles. Oh Paul, you're lovely. Overly sentimental and lovely.

9) "Home Life" by John Mayer. "Think I'm gonna stay home. Have myself a home life." Despite the fact that I am terrified about this grown up thing, I'm hoping that I can stay put for a while.

10) "I Must Belong Somewhere" by Bright Eyes. Generally I have no idea what Conor Oberst is talking about and I don't know if this song even relates but he says "leave" and "leaving" a lot. Meh.

11) "In My Room" by The Beach Boys. It worries me how much I relate to Brian Wilson. Sometimes I'd like to just hide out in my room too.

12) "Useless Desires" by Patty Griffin. My old roommate Krysta and I love this song. She thinks it's about suicide whereas I just think it's about a woman leaving a town or place that never really treated her that well. Either way, it is so depressing and hopeful all at the same time that I can't help but love it. Patty Griffin is a genius.

13) "Katie's Been Gone" by Bob Dylan and The Band. How could I not put this song on the mix?

14) "Moon River" by Audrey Hepburn. Audrey Hepburn's voice is so perfect for this song. I know a lot of people gave her crap for her lack of singing talent but I think it's lovely. "Two drifters off to see the world. There's such a lot of world to see." Sure, I'm only one drifter but I think it works.

15) "You Can't Always Get What You Want" by The Rolling Stones. This is another song that I will try to put on every mix I make. I love the sad beginning with the french horn and the crazy, happy, jubilant ending. A fine way to end a mix.

I've basically been listening to it non-stop and I'll be blasting it while packing up the last of my stuff so I can leave for Cedarburg tonight. I won't have internet at my apartment but I'll try my best to keep you all updated on my new chapter in my "adventures in library land" (was that too cheesy? eh. whatever.)

Fairest of the seasons indeed.

Moving On Up To The East Side... Of Wisconsin.

2007-05-14T11:16:00.000-07:00

Instead of writing a long rambling entry about moving, here are five moving related things of note:

1) UHaul sucks ass. Two weeks ago, I reserved a 6x12 trailer for Saturday and I called again on Friday to confirm the reservation and check on the time. When my dad and I went to pick it up, it was gone and there was no explanation why. So they told us there was one in Cottage Grove but oh wait that place closed at 11am. So, they gave us a 5x8 trailer and a free set of moving blankets for our trouble (oh wooh a set of moving blankets!) Luckily, the lovely and talented Caroline is a UHaul packing genius; she piled and stacked and everything fit!

2) My parents rock. I know I say it all the time but my parents slathered on IcyHot, wrapped themselves in ace bandages and hauled my stuff once again. As my dad reminded me, "we've moved you 14 times over the past seven years" and the fact that they continue to put up with my nomadic tendencies just proves how great they are. And my mom even postponed her mother's day treatment to help haul all of my boxes of books up and down the stairs. Mom and Dad, I promise that next time, I will hire movers.

3) I love my new apartment! It is shocking at how big it is and how nice it is. What's even more shocking is the amount of stuff I don't have. In my past apartments, I've always looked like a packrat--there were piles clothes that were sitting in laundry baskets because there was no where else to put it. I had books spilling out of my book shelves and the two bookshelves were crowding my little room. But now that I have this huge apartment instead of a little room and half of a little living room, I look positively minimalistic!

4) I met two of my new neighbors. Bernice, a nice little old lady, who I don't think will be playing Jimi Hendrix songs on her electric guitar at 2:30 in the morning. And Nate, my next door neighbor who's about my age and walked up the stairs dressed completely in camouflage (hat, shirt, pants and jacket!), carrying a rifle holder. Toto, I don't think we're in Madison anymore.

5) I'm turning into my mother. My mother gets stuck on ideas, especially when it comes to my life and the things I have in my apartment. For the last five years, she has been preaching the gospel of when I get some money saved, I should "invest in a nice bedroom set." After seeing the massive amount of shoes I own (and yet I only wear two pairs of flip flops and my black ballet flats) and the hugeness of my closets (yes, that's plural :)), she's decided I need to buy Tupperware containers for each pair of shoes that I own. Before, I laughed at her and rolled my eyes. However, I've found my own obsession: I want and need an rolling island for my kitchen. Must. Have. It. I don't have drapes for my bedroom or my living room and I have one lamp for the entire apartment which is lacking serious overhead lighting. And yet, the first thing I'm going to buy with my tax return is an island for my kitchen.... because I am no longer living in the land of galley kitchens! I have space! Specifically a cute little corner where it can hang out and look adorable and then perhaps I'll actually cook meals! *catches breath* See, I'm crazed! Who knows, maybe my next purchase will be a nice bedroom set.

So, yes, I made it. Thanks for all of your well-wishes. I promise I'll post pictures when everything gets settled.

Bridge to a Mental Breakdown

2007-05-10T14:00:00.000-07:00

I've been feeling a little bit emotional lately. First, most of it is the sheer terror of my impending grownup hood and the fact that I'm leaving my socialable supported life in Madison behind in favor of a two bedroom apartment in a strange new land with no one to watch the Bachelor with me. Secondly, I'm also horribly short on sleep and when I don't sleep enough, that's when you can expect me to break out in a sob or two at any given moment. And, finally, I'm the kind of person who needs to have a good weep every now and again to remain stable. I haven't had a weep in a while because I'm trying reallyhard *insert jaw clenching here* to keep it all together until at least next week. So I'm kind of a mess...

This creates issues because I still have to function and that's just not happening. For instance, I need to be writing a paper about intellectual freedom for my young adult literature course. I need to read a book that's been banned, come up with a fake scenario in which I was working at a library and said book was challenged, write a speech that I would present to the committee making the decision about the challenge, create an annotated bibliography of the sources I used to support the book and also a list of resources I could turn to in case I do have a book challenged at my library some day. This is due tomorrow (and yet, here I am type type typing away on my blog!) and I think my emotional state of mind is really fucking with my ability to function academically.

Here's the problem: the book that I'm defending is Bridge to Terabithia. Now, I loved this book, absolutely loved it. I won't ruin it for you if you haven't read it but I will say this, if you are feeling kind of overly emotional (as I am) this is not the book to read. I was reading in the SLIS library, blinking back tears, swallowing the lump in my throat and trying to keep it together, fearing that if I actually let the tears tumble down my cheeks, they just wouldn't stop.

Here's the bigger problem: I'm now trying to defend this book that I loved and that made me really sad and yet happy and hopeful etc etc etc. This means I'm dwelling a lot on this book. I'm reading reviews of it, articles about it, reading passages from it and now I'm writing a heartfelt, passionate, inspiring speech pleading rationally and well supportedly (god the grammar) to keep this book on the shelves. And I'm tearing up every five seconds, particularly when I start to think about if this book would happen to be challenged in my library and if I had to stand up in front of the community that pays my bills and defend this perfect, lovely book. That's when the tears really start to well. Hell, I'm even getting emotional writing this stupid entry.

Honestly, I'm tempted to watch Dead Poets Society or another depressing movie that I would have in my movie collection and have a good cry and get it out of my system. Shit, never mind. All of my movies are already packed. Sigh.

Mother and Daughter

2007-05-07T00:11:00.000-07:00

Mom: So all of these books are going to Cedarburg?
Katie: Yup.
Mom: Really? All of them?
Katie: Of course... why?
Mom: Well, do you really need to bring all of them?
Katie: Well of course I do. Why wouldn't I?
Mom: Well, what are you going to do with them?
Katie: Um... put them on a shelf? Look at them? Read them sometimes? Love them forever and never get rid of them?
Mom: But do you really need them? I mean all of these? I just don't get it.
Katie: Mom. I hoard books. This is what I've always done. And now I'm a librarian so I'm basically a professional book hoard-er. I need the books. Gotta have 'em. Gotta bring 'em. Got it?
Mom: Well, fine, then you get to carry them.

"Have fun hauling this one up those stairs!"

Just a sampling of bookiness.

Kind of depressing, right? No? Just me?

You're Gonna Make It After All

2007-04-29T00:01:00.000-07:00

Last night I was home alone; I should have been packing or doing homework but I was sort of restless, bored and mopey so I was watching television. I saw an ad for Nick At Nite and had a flashback to the Mary Tyler Moore Show. That was my favorite show when I was ten--during the summer, Nick at Nite used to have "Very Mary Mondays" or something like that and they would show four episodes in a row. I got hooked and would spend every Monday night watching Mary Tyler Moore while all of my friends in my neighborhood played kick the can. I thought Mary was the coolest thing ever; I wanted to be just like her, moving to the city, throwing horrible parties, wearing cute mini skirts and sleeping on a pull-out sofa. I haven't watched the show in a few years but I still think that Mary has had an effect on me. So, being the good time waster that I am, I went on YouTube and found the theme song to Mary Tyler Moore. I think one of the main reasons I loved the Mary Tyler Moore Show was because of the theme song. Now there's two versions to the theme song. There's the version that everyone seems to know which starts "Who can turn the world on with her smile? Who can take a nothing day and suddenly make it all seem worthwhile?" However, this post has to do with the first theme song for the Mary Tyler Moore Show. Same delightful melody, same heartwarming theme of "Love is All Around, No Need to Waste It..." But, this version is all about Mary leaving her happy, safe secure life behind and moving to the big city to make it on her own. It all seems very pertinent. I'm ready to move--well, emotionally because lord knows I haven't packed more than one box. I'm ready to leave Madison behind (but come back to visit of course) in favor of a new city with new people and new challenges. And maybe I'll be lucky enough to meet my very own Rhoda, Ted, Murray or Mr. Grant. That being said, I really must go find a beret! Or is that more of a tam?

Nobody Does It Better....

2007-04-22T00:04:00.000-07:00

I knew a guy back in college who was your basic hipster, intellectual nightmare with the most emo taste in music ever. When it came to music, he was very often exhausting. Every concert he ever went to was "the best concert ever." Now, I'm going to pull a him and tell you that the concert I went to on Saturday was the best concert ever. I've gone to a lot of concerts--I've seen a lot of darn good musicians who play darn good concerts. I've seen these concerts at quite impressive venues. And yet, this one trumped them all and I can see this concert staying the cream of the crop for a very long time. You're intrigued aren't you?

Four words: Old Crow Medicine Show.

Why was this concert the best one I've ever seen? Many reasons... here's a handy list in order from small reasons to big reasons:

1) I was in the first row. I spent most of my time leaning up against the stage and keeping beat by drumming my hands on the stage. ON THE STAGE! I was so close to Ketch Secor that I got hit with harmonica spit a few times (I was not complaining).

2) Speaking of Ketch: this band is comprised of five men, three of whom have the craziest, coolest names ever. Namely (ha!), Critter Fuqua, Willie Watson (not crazy but it sounds nice) and Ketch Secor. For some reason, that makes me like them even more.

3) Not only do they have some great names, they also have some very good looking boys in O.C.M.S. Yowza. Don't believe me? Tada... it takes a while to load but it's worth it. And actually, they're better looking in person. I would know, I was about 5 feet away from them :)

4) Now, good looking with nice names? We both know that does not a good concert make, much less the best concert ever. To use a phrase I don't feel comfortable using, these boys can play. Their musicianship and their understanding of the genre is so impressive. They sound better in concert than on the record. They have enthusiasm and stage presence and you can tell they love playing together. And as a crowd member, it's hard not to be impressed by that. I was stomping and clapping and when I left, I was sweaty, giddy and hoarse (I think I once yelled out what sounded like a "yee haw"!)

5) Here's the final reason... I'm not really a bluegrass fan. (Someone told me they weren't bluegrass--they were an old string band. Either or.) Generally, I avoid that style of music like the plague because most of it feels very cheesy, old fashioned and stale sounding. But, Old Crow Medicine Show won me over--they're that good.

And even though I find myspace rather irritating and strange (no reasons why... just do), I would recommend checking out their myspace page. Listen to a few of their songs (my personal favorite is Wagon Wheel), watch their video for Down Home Girl and check out their beautiful faces.

A,B,C... Easy as 1,2,3

2007-04-12T20:56:00.000-07:00

I could tell you about my weekend... or I could just fill out this meme and write about my weekend later. And if you think that I'll probably never write about my weekend, you're probably right :)

[A is for age]: 24
[B is for beer of choice]: Oh it's so hard to chose. Newcastle or Smithwicks or a nice local brew but I also love Miller Lite and other cheep beer i.e. Natural Light or High Life or PBR (I blame that on my genes--my dad will only drink cheap beer)
[C is for career]: Children's Librarian!
[D is for your dog’s name]: Sneakers--a smooth haired daschund. She was named that when we got her and I wanted to rename her Brain ala Inspector Gadget (I was also seven). She was the cutest thing ever and I miss her horribly. I can't wait to get my own dog... hopefully a doxie.
[E is for your essential daily item]: Underwear?
[F is for favorite song at the moment]: Never My Love by the Association. It's so sappy and it's lovely to listen to through headphones.
[G is for favorite games]: Dominoes
[H is for Hometown]: Neenah, WI
[I is for the instrument you play]: Well, as I've mentioned before, I'm a quitter, so instead of instrument you play, let's rephrase and say instrument you've quit: piano, clarinet and voice.
[J is for favorite flavor of juice]: Cran-grape juice... yum.
[K is for kids]: They're cute? I like them? What should I be saying? I don't know if I want to have children... but working with them/for them will be wonderful and crazy, I'm sure.
[L is for last hug?]: From my parents who came down to visit yesterday
[M is for marriage]: I'd like to but it scares the bejeezus out of me.
[N is for name of your crush]: Celebrity crush? Clive Owen (hubba hubba), Robert Sean Leonard, John Krasinski... quite a nice sample, really.
[O is for overnight hospital stays]: I had my appendix out when I was four, so that was a nice long stay.
[P is for phobias]: Spiders, clowns, heights, falling down stairs, commitment? :)
[Q is for quote]: “Drama is very important in life: You have to come on with a bang. You never want to go out with a whimper. Everything can have drama if it's done right. Even a pancake."
-Julia Child
[R is for biggest regret]: Overthinking and being scared and letting some good things slip away. And that I let it keep happening--I don't learn from it. To quote Jackson Browne, "These days I seem to think a lot about the things that I forgot to do and all the times I had the chance to."
[S is for status]: ummm single?
[T is for time you wake up]: Either 7:30 or 8:30 depending on the day.
[U is for underwear]: Currently, mine are blue. I bought them at Target.
[V is for vegetable you love]: Zucchini, edamame (not really a vegetable), artichoke hearts, red peppers, peas (again, not really a vegetable)
[W is for worst habit]: Pushing away nice boys, being messy, procrastination, eating when I'm bored
[X is for x-rays you’ve had]: Lots of them when I broke my wrists, significantly more when I kept spraining my wrist and they figured out that my bone had healed in the wrong spot when they reset in the emergency room, my hips during a visit to the chiropractor when I was 14
[Y is for yummy food you make]: I make a fine zucchini melt--of course, it's not my recipe but it's pretty much the only thing I can make.
[Z is for zodiac]: Scorpio. To quote some random website: "Determined and forceful. Emotional and intuitive. Powerful and passionate. Exciting and magnetic. Jealous and resentful. Compulsive and obsessive. Secretive and obstinate." It's no wonder I'm so crazy. ;)

Okay, back to work... Oh and Happy National Library Week! Sidenote: Could the ALA website be any more ugly or any less user friendly? Bleech.

Back to Life, Back to Reality

2007-04-10T14:18:00.000-07:00

When I decided to join my fellow SLISers (and friends of SLISers) on a trip to Florida, I knew it would be my last hurrah. I understood that after I returned, I'd finish up school while packing to move on the last day of classes then come back for a week, graduate, move permanently to Cedarburg and start preparing for the summer reading program. Even though I knew this, I'm still having immense issues adjusting to life after vacation. As much as I love vacations, it's my understanding that life hits you with a stress bomb when you get off the plane. And really, how are supposed to cope with life when your surroundings looked like this just a few days ago?

Particularly when you you spent those days hang outing with these ridiculously nice and fun people...

Quite difficult, right? After I got back from vacation, I had to find an apartment in Cedarburg. Initially I was excited about this; I thought it would be fun! Ha! No! Not fun at all! Luckily, though, I found a wonderful apartment just slightly out of my price range (just slightly) with two bedrooms, huge closets, an air conditioner, a dishwasher and a garbage disposal, all located a mile away from the library, with a bike path to connect the two. You really can't ask for much more. And when I called the landlady this morning to tell her she'd be receiving my application soon, she said, "Are you the librarian? Oh good, I was hoping you'd call back." Hopefully, I will sign the lease within the next few days and not be homeless for the upcoming year.

So, big relief--the apartment is basically set. However, of course, in my worry filled world, the next worry is a financial one. I'm quickly running out of loan money (damn me spending my money on earrings from Target and episodes of The Office on iTunes!) and I have to put down a security deposit and a month of rent for two places by May! Holy wake up call batman. I'm seriously considering eating ramen for the rest of the school year, giving plasma, finding a sugar daddy, or doing a medical research study. It's quite (okay, extremely) nerve wracking and this entire becoming a grown up thing has given me lots of nice big issues to think about when I'm trying to fall asleep. When those moments arise, I'm trying to remember to channel "Vacation Katie" and calm the fuck down:

*a rare moment of serenity*

The Trouble with Procrastination

2007-03-26T08:11:00.000-07:00

So, it's been two weeks since the last post (but who's counting, right?) and I'm sorry for disappearing on you guys! But, I have figured out why I tend to just up and leave: I'm a procrastinator. This creates blog posting issues for two reasons: 1) If I don't have a deadline, I won't do anything. Really. If I want to get things done, I have to create imaginary deadlines just so I'll eventually get around to taking care of whatever needs to be done. And I really think that creating deadlines for my blogging would just push me over the edge. 2) Because I'm a procrastinator, I am always on a very tight homework schedule. For instance, I have two reader response journal entries due tomorrow at 6pm. Before writing said assignments, I have to read two books. Currently, neither book has been read... heck, they're not even in my possession! And tonight, I'm going to concert and I have to work tomorrow morning so I'll be reading Ella Enchanted and The Giver tomorrow afternoon... and then writing hastily thrown together reader response journals. Needless to say, it's rather difficult to squeeze a blog entry into my self inflicted stressful life.

You're probably thinking, "But Katie, why don't you just stop? You'd be less stressed out and you'd have more time to post on your blog (and clean your room and exercise and do your laundry and hang out with your friends and do your dishes and make a nice dinner once and a while)." Honestly, I'd love to but I can't. Procrastination works for me... it's like my brain won't work unless it has to (so sad...) And in general, my bad behavior is reinforced with good grades and positive feedback from my teachers. And I only have a month and a half more left of school. I'm slightly concerned that my procrastinating tendencies are going to follow me into my job but I really don't have time to worry about that right now :) We'll cross that bridge when we get to it.

So, once again... sorry for the lack of posts. If it makes you feel any better, I'm not withholding any fun or entertaining news from you. Life is pretty boring right now. But, come Friday, I'll be leaving for Key Largo!!! Hurray vacation! Hurray last spring break before the real world beckons! Hurray sun and sand and key lime pie and fruity drinks! You can bet I will have something to post about then.

Oh but before I go, here's something I overheard last week at the public library at my practicum:

Mom to 1 year old daughter: "We're going to check out at the front desk. Can you say front desk? Front desk! Anna, say Front desk"
Daughter: "Elmo!"

Raindrops on Roses

2007-03-12T20:39:00.000-07:00

Today was a very very very bad day at the Astronomy library. I screwed up. Well, rather I have been screwing up (and not realizing it obviously) for the last um let's say eight months and it's bad. I'm an idiot. It's now quite clear that I was not made to be the head student assistant at the Astronomy library (it was clear before but now the clarity is astounding) and I'm quite sure that my bosses will be glad to have my gone. In short, this afternoon sucked ass.

However, when when the dog bites, when the bee stings, when I'm feeling sad, I simply remember my favorite things and then I don't feel so bad. Here are a few of my recently discovered favorite things:

1) My practicum at the public library. Have I mentioned how much I love my practicum? It has fully cemented that I belong in a public library. Tonight I was helping a little boy find two books that he couldn't seem to find on the shelf. After tracking down both of them, he told me, "You're amazing!" Sure, I can't function at the astro library but damn it, at the public library, I'm amazing. It's pretty darn cool.

2) Indulging in my love for oldies. Recently purchased songs on iTunes include "Hello Stranger" by Barbara Lewis and "Runaround Sue" by Dion and the Belmonts. Yes, I am an old lady.

3) Planning for the future. Apartment hunting is in the works; I've been looking for a place with two bedrooms and, shockingly, I do believe I can afford it. Two bedrooms! That means two closets! All for me! I am so excited to have space and a place to call my own and to stay there for more than a year...

4) Wes Anderson. I wish my life could be directed by Wes Anderson... and then as a huge bonus, my life would have the coolest soundtrack ever!

5) Outlet mall shopping. Particularly when the shopping partner is my mother, who for some odd reason thinks that I have no summer clothes and thus will have nothing to wear to Key West. I'm going to be gone for four days but with the amount of clothing purchased, I could stay for the next three months.

See? Not so bad. Astronomy schstronomy! Now, I really must go and make some clothes out of my bedroom curtains!

10 Minutes in My Head

2007-03-06T22:05:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow I'm going to get up early and I'm going to do my dishes. And then I'm going to read ahead for class before I have to work.... Well, I should actually get some groceries so maybe I'll do that and dishes instead of reading.... No, I'll do dishes when I get back from work... Oh but wait I have to go to cardio tomorrow... Okay, well, after work and after cardio, I will do my dishes... and then I can go to Woodman's in the morning... Ohh, instead of going to Woodman's, I'll go to Trader Joe's and get something pre-made for lunch, like one of those veggie burritos.... or one those salads... But I should really be working ahead for school, especially since that spring break trip is coming up and I know I won't get anything done that week... ooh, I wonder if Target still has those cute wedges... those would be perfect for Key West.... Oooo, instead of going to Trader Joe's, I could go to Target tomorrow morning and buy some cute sandals for spring break and perhaps some earrings.... oh and some lean cuisines and a box of granola bars. Yeah, that'll work.

Work It Baby, Work It

2007-02-28T12:11:00.000-08:00

So it seems that the hundreds of hours I have spent obsessing about jobs (including having visions of me living at home in my parents' basement or working in Mississippi in a swamp somewhere) were kind of a waste of time. Turns out I'm quite employable....

Yes... I have a job. I feel like this situation demands cussing--so let me rephrase. I have a mothafuckin' job!!!! Oh and please do not be afraid, it's not the weird job with the questions re: my happiness. It is the nice, normal job that called me back for a second interview. I know I said I wasn't sure but after lots of obsessing in my head (yup, I'm an obsesser...) and lots of advice from many sage-like sources, I was all in for the job. Would you like the details? Okay, I willl oblige :)

General Location: Small public library in a small town north of Milwaukee

Position: Children's Librarian (i.e. I'm in charge. No really. In charge of the department with an assistant to... well... assist me. This is the terrifying part.)

Pros: It's a job. And the people are nice, really really nice. And the town is cute, really really cute. And they think I'd be good at it (I'm starting to believe.) And I love small towns. And they're building a new library! And I will get to have my say in what happens in the children's department! (The power is intoxicating!) And it's close to Milwaukee... where I have friends!

Cons: Ummmmm. The amount of responsibility involved is terrifying. Really truly terrifying. *MUST. BE. BRAVE* Also, I will be starting at the end of May. The summer reading program starts beginning of June. And then the madness will overtake me.

Now, I must get back to freaking out about the responsibility and basking in the glow of employment.

Love is All You Need...

2007-02-18T21:05:00.000-08:00

So originally I was going to post this on Valentine's Day... then the day after Valentine's Day... then three days after Valentine's Day. Obviously, that didn't happen. But, in the spirit of living through another Valentine's Day, here is a love oriented, Valentine's Day related list with lots of pictures...

1) Back when I was 18 years old, I truly and honestly believed that John Mayer was my soulmate and that we would get married. I believed this so much that I actually wrote an essay for my college German class all about my love for John Mayer and why he should love me back. My professor's comments? *Auf English* "Interesting! Good luck!" Luckily, I've overcome this quirk and can now just appreciate his music. But, it was oh so appropriate that he was playing in Madison for Valentine's Day. Of course, I had to go. And I had a wonderful date, Amy, my fellow John enthusiast.

And of course, I didn't bring my camera into the show (I follow concert rules... okay, most rules in general) but, I found this with the help of Google (of course!) and this basically what the concert looked like:

I know many of you were wondering if Jessica was there... well, I didn't see her but Annie sent me this the morning after the concert. (Really, what would we do without Perez Hilton...) As Katie C. wisely commented on Friday, it seems Jessica has given up all hopes of a music career and is now latching on to John's... including memorizing all of the lyrics to all of his songs. I personally wish her the best of luck.

2) Valentine's Day gifts are the best... particularly the unexpected ones. Amy's roommates made me a cookie with my name on it! I was quite touched, particularly since they're saints for putting up with me always hanging out in their living room.

3) On Thursday, I received an email from the library where I had the non-weird interview... and they want me to come in for a second interview to meet the assistant director! Holy moses!!!! I am definitely feeling the library love but I'm not sure if I'm willing to return it. There are a lot of positive points about this library but also a few negative ones. This whole growing up and becoming an adult and making decisions about the future thing sucks.

4) On Sunday morning, my parents were in the area and took me out to breakfast. They also gave me a bag full of random junk mail addressed to me (why they don't just throw it out, I don't know) and belated Valentine's Day presents i.e. a hollow milk chocolate frog with a gummy bug inside. Generally my mom strays away from these types of gifts so it seemed a little weird but it was a nice gesture. So I was looking at the box while not doing my homework and noticed this on the back of the box:

My mother regifted a Valentine's Day present!!! Now, my mom is a crossing guard and spoils her kids rotten and in turn the parents give her tons of present for every major holiday. For example, she gets lots and lots of lotion and soaps for Christmas presents and since she has sensitive skin, I inherit most of it. But regifting chocolate frogs!? That just doesn't seem right!

All right, must go back to doing homework... this whole starting reader response papers at 11:32 on a Sunday night is rather ridiculous.

Google... Who Knew?

2007-02-12T10:55:00.000-08:00

I now have a love affair with Google Calendar. I knew that Leah and other SLISers used it but I always thought that it seemed a little bit pointless. I had a weekly planner in paper form and I never used it. So I didn't really see the point of adding more crap to my already cluttered life. Then, on Saturday, I was over at Amy's, buying tickets to go see John Mayer on Valentines Day (more about that in a few days!), when she logged into her Google Calendar. I must say, I was slightly taken aback. It was soo cool! And it looked helpful and organizational and like it might even keep me from losing my mind! So Amy sent me an invitation (complete with the cheesy, Google generated "message from Amy") and I signed up. And wasted a good chunk of my Saturday night creating my very own Google calendar. I've placed reminders on events and obligations that I know I will forget and I've changed my setting so my events are purple! Too neat!

And of course, it's coming in handy for other reasons as well.... for some crazy reason, I will put off homework and other obligations like nobody's business unless it's in writing, in an official form. Yes, I enjoy following the rules... So when I got this email from my mom this morning....

Hi Sweetheart, Dad and I are coming down to Madison this weekend to see you. Let us know which day is better for you. Dad would prefer Saturday but if Sunday is better for you, let me know. Love, Mom

... I knew just what to do. I logged into my handy dandy Google calendar and added a new event: Friday, February 16th. Noon-5pm: Clean Like a Mad Woman. And set a reminder 1 day in advance.

Weirded Out!

2007-02-09T22:37:00.000-08:00

So, Leah mentioned in her blog that Jack's crazy days on 24 were possible. I wouldn't know about the Jack thing (yes, I am a freak... I don't watch 24) but I wholeheartedly agree with her astute observation (cheesewhiz on the bus!? crazy!). So, Leah had a crazy day. I have had a weird week. And thus, I am officially weirded out and waiting for something even more weird to occur.

Last Friday, I mentioned that exciting things were happening in my life. And it's true... I got two job interviews!!! For real professional librarianing positions. I won't go into too much detail but I will say that the first job interview went quite well and if I would be available right now (damn you May graduation!), I think I would have a shot.

But, the weirdness comes in during the second job. I was getting interviewed by the director of the public library and a random woman. This random woman never introduced herself and the director never introduced her and in my sheer interview panic, I didn't even think about it. So, she was asking me questions and the entire time, I was thinking "Who is she? This is weird." But it got worse. They asked the weirdest interview questions in the world. There were certain questions I was expecting in a job interview for a children's librarian. I expected those standard "Give us an example when you showed leadership" questions and I figured that I would have to talk about my experience with children, programming, book selection and other things. And we talked about that for a little bit... but there were four pages of questions and most of them were just downright weird:

1) Are you happy?
2) Why are you happy?
3) How do you know you are happy?
4) How would you describe your best friend?
5) Do you appreciate your life?
6) How do you know you appreciate your life?
7) Why do you appreciate your life?
8) Who is your hero?
9) Use some adjectives to describe someone who is negative.

And then the awkwardly worded questions... they were asking me these vague, yes or no questions... I could have come up with better questions.

Examples:
1) Do you like booktalks? (Not do you have experience booktalking? How would you use booktalking in programming?)
2) Do you like technology? (And no, they didn't want to know if I had any experience with technology... just if I liked it or not.)
3) Would you be willing to work with babies and teens? (What am I going to say, no?)
4) What are your favorite books/CDs/websites/movies? But not for children... they didn't care about that... they just wanted to know about my personal taste.

In short, it was weird. I didn't notice much during the interview but then I left and as I was driving out of the city, it hit me and I thought to myself, "That was weird. That was really weird." And I was officially weirded out.

Then, three days later, weirdness once again rears it ugly head at the GSC social (basically a breading ground for awkwardness, if we're going to be truly honest). The source of this weirdness was Chris, a GSC regular, who is normally quite nice and respectable, in a Southern gentleman kind of way. But then, weirdness hit:

*Aretha Franklin's "I Never Loved a Man the Way I Loved You" is playing in the background. I am grooving out in my chair, as I have a tendency to do when a good song is playing and there is alcohol involved.*
Chris: I can see you dancing to this song *pause pause* at a strip club.
Me: Excuse me?
Chris: Oh yeah, you and the pole. I don't know what you're wearing but I know what I'm wearing.
Me: Oh my god. *awkward pause* I don't think I could ever be a stripper. Especially to an Aretha Franklin song. Especially to this song.
Chris: I think you're the stripping type. A little bit of a shimmy.
Me: No, I am not. Oh my god. Ahh, weird! I can't believe you just said that.
Chris: I could say something more but that would be crossing the line.

WEIRDED OUT! Even now, I am shuddering in horror.

So, it's been a weird week. And I'm hoping that tomorrow will start a new week, free of weird. Because really, all of this weirdness really makes me want to hide under my covers until it's safe.

Hail Poetry!

2007-02-02T13:22:00.000-08:00

So supposedly, today is the Second Annual (Silent) Poetry Reading for bloggers.... and you know how I love a good theme (if you didn't, well, now you know.) And since I'm keeping all of the exciting things under wraps (for now! I promise!), I am taking part in this poetry reading so you all have something to read. This poem seemed oh so very relevant:

Eating Poetry by Mark Strand

Ink runs from the corners of my mouth.
There is no happiness like mine.
I have been eating poetry.

The librarian does not believe what she sees.
Her eyes are sad
and she walks with her hands in her dress.

The poems are gone.
The lights are dim.
The dogs are on the basement stairs and coming up.

Their eyeballs roll,
their blond legs bum like brush.
The poor librarian begins to stamp her feet and weep.

She does not understand.
When I get on my knees and lick her hand,
she screams.

I am a new man.
I snarl at her and bark.
I romp with joy in the bookish dark.

Lists!

2007-01-25T13:57:00.000-08:00

I'm stealing this from Leah and Marty because I am not feeling creative...

FAVORITES
Favorite Color: Blue (but not navy or baby blue... somewhere in between with a hint of teal thrown in for good measure)
Favorite Month: November
Favorite Movie: Singin' in the Rain
Favorite Sport: Football
Favorite Season: Autumn
Favorite Day of the week: Thursday
Favorite Ice Cream Flavor: Caramel Swirl
Favorite Time of Day: late night

CURRENTS
Current Mood: Tired, frustrated, freaked out
Current Clothes: Jeans, blue cotton zip up hoodie, salmon colored gap t-shirt and white and navy pumas
Current Desktop: something my supervisor put up
Current Toenail Color: ditto to Leah (heheheee)
Current Time: 4:00pm
Current Surroundings: work
Current Thoughts: I should really be working

LASTS
Last Cigarette: n/a (I've never smoked)
Last Drink: Brandy Old Fashioned sour at Genna's with the librarianing folk
Last Car Ride: Driving to the post office this morning
Last Kiss: blar. no clue. (not counting parents, loved ones, etc.)
Last Movie Seen: Take the Lead (Antonio is so saucy)
Last Phone Call: Wrong number at work
Last CD Played: Appalachian Journey by Yo-Yo Ma, Edgar Meyer and Mark O'Connor (thanks again Julia!)

THINGS
Thing You're Wearing: long underwears
Things You've Done Today: Finished application (gah), went to post office, bought stamps from stamp vending machine, sent applications, freaked out, bought a smoothie and a muffin at ZuZu Cafe, went to work, talked to my supervisor, freaked about problem with application, emailed library director, put books on reserve, drank some tomato soup in a cup, updated library website, slacked, updated blog
Thing You Can Hear Right Now: hum of computers, me typing, streaming Minnesota Public Radio classical music
Thing You Can't Stand: a lot... especially today (v. cranky.)
Thing You Do When You're Bored: watch pointless tv

4 PLACES YOU'VE BEEN TODAY
1. My car
2. Post Office
3. Work
4. ZuZu Cafe

3 PEOPLE YOU CAN TELL ANYTHING TO
only two: Julia and Amy

2 CHOICES
1. Black or White: Black
2. Hot or Cold: Cold

1 THING YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE
Achieve inner poise

Don't Be Such a Square

2007-01-21T22:26:00.000-08:00

About one year ago, I found myself sitting in Leah's apartment, fighting off cat allergies, drinking wine and learning how to knit (again). Granted, I didn't actually start and finish something I would actually use until this past summer (which makes complete sense... overheating in my non-airconditioned apartment and knitting... duh). But, I do believe I've found a hobby for myself, hopefully one that I will stick with and grow with. I also know I need to branch out and learn new techniques, but I have to do it on my own terms. I know there are lots of knitters out there who knit a sweater as their first project or who learned how to cable or knit lace or use dpn needles during their first year of knitting. And that is great for them (I'm jealous) but it's just not me. Personally, I just want to knit something beyond a square. For example, I was thinking back to what I've made since I started knitting and it's a long long list of square-like objects:

4 scarves
3 dishrags
1 iPod sleeping bag

While discussing my future projects with my mom, she basically told me that I need to stop knitting scarves, making the point that if I knit more of my favorite accessories, I'd have to start wearing two or three at a time just to get use out of them. The woman makes a good point. Then, of course, we decided that this point would be best made with a picture:

Now, I am a very big proponent of using cotton dishrags for headwear (and shoulder pads too!) but let's do some simple math. I own about 10 scarves, many of which never see the light of day (I have my favorites), and I own 1 hat. I do believe it's time for a hat. Leah, my helpful knitting guru, has helpfully provided me with a pattern (holy shit a pattern!) which I have studied, over analyzed and freaked out about for the last week. I think I will be able to handle this. There are no dpns or knitting in the round... just straight stockinette with a few decreases and seamin' to finish it all up. On Thursday, I took a trip to Lakeside Fibers and picked up this:

And to continue on with my knitting development, I picked up this as well:

And despite my trepidation, in between mourning the Saints' loss and yelling things at the tv during the Colts game (such as: Peyton, I love you!), this appeared:

It's a start. Well, to be specific, it's approximately 3.5" of K3P3 ribbing. Still, definitely a start.

We'll Be Sending Out Save the Date Cards Soon...

2007-01-18T07:50:00.000-08:00

What Do These Two Men Have in Common?

I received the answer this morning in an email from my mom :

subject: Stuff (*note* every subject line is stuff... no matter what)

Hi Honey,

Well, I don't know if you heard the news or not but Chris Capuano got a big fat raise. He went from $340,000 to $3.4 million. Now, dad said if you were going to make a move now is the time. Just think... all of those student loans could be history!!!!! Also,we just heard that Brett Belima -spelling?- is single and you know how we love football. I really don't think you hang out in the same circles but maybe you could check that one out too!!!!! All of the possibilities here!!!!

Love and Bear Hugs
Mom

Two possible husbands in just one day! How lucky am I!? (I think I'd have to take Chris....)

Five for Friday

2007-01-12T12:42:00.000-08:00

Top 5 Things I Learned at My Many Librarianing Gigs Today (all two of 'em):

1) The librarian stereotype exists for a reason. Cute shoes do not work for librarianing. Sensible is where it's at. I'm sure sensible but cute shoes are out there somewhere but I'm too busy looking for pants.

2) Cleaning out file cabinets is fun! Prizes found today at the astronomy library: one pamphlet from 1989 filed under "harassment, sexual" titled "Are You Afraid of Homosexuals?" with the first line "Many people are--it's called homophobia" and one letter from 1996 filed under "letters (reference questions)" which starts with "I have been incarcerated for two years now and I have had a huge interest in Astronomy." Priceless artifacts, people. Priceless.

3) Limits on how many books can be checked out are put there for a reason. One student came in to check out a book and said "I'm kind of worried that I have too many books checked out." I said, "Most students never reach 250. I'm sure it's fine." How many books did he have checked out? 249.

4) I look like a girl who can reorganize a journal display case. (It's true. I can.)

5) Die cutting music notes and musical instruments is fun for maybe an hour. After that, it's ridiculous.

Pants! Shakes Fist Weeps

2007-01-10T11:12:00.000-08:00

So remember when I said I wanted a new blog so I could post pictures easily? Well, in case you haven't noticed, that hasn't happened. I have the camera, I have the pictures; however, I'm new at this whole technology thing and I (of course) forgot the chord thingie and the software for my computer at home. My mom (who rocks) is sending me a digital camera care package and I will be posting pictures in the very near future. And then I can finally write posts about my new shoes and my new years knitting resolutions. Woot.

In the meantime, I'd like to take a few moments to rant about how much I hate buying pants. And I'm warning you: it's a rant. I'm 5'10" and that creates issues because I don't really have long legs; I have a long torso. Thus, the regulars are too short (but barely) and the long sizes create a puddle effect. And so I have to go to a tailor because I don't want to look sloppy (as my mother would say.) And stores generally don't have longs in my size so I have to attempt to buy pants online and then pay shipping and handling and hope they fit and then if they do fit, I have to take them to a tailor and pay more frickin money. And if they don't, they have to get sent back--damn you shipping and handling! And it seems like I am always buying pants! It's no secret that I've gained weight since I've gone to graduate school... but this newly acquired poundage doesn't reek havoc on my sweaters or shirts. It's the pants that get screwed up. It's like a cruel cruel joke. All of the dress pants I toiled to find and bought for my job at Edgewood no longer fit. They're perfectly good pants and they're sitting in my frickin closet staring at me. And what do I have to do? I have to go back online or out to the mall and try on pair after pair after pair and then go home and feel depressed. And then I go online again and feel panicked because I have no clue if the pants that the size two model is wearing are going to look good on me! GAAAH.

It's enough to make a girl crazy. And as you can tell, it is. Thus far, in the great hunt for work pants (damn you practicum!), I have purchased two pairs of grey pants (one striped, one not.)from New York and Company (thank god for them... even if there's not a natural fiber in the store) and I just ordered this pair of pants from the Gap:

I'm terrified. The entire situation is ripe with potential for failure. These pants could look HORRIBLE on me.

God I hate pants.

Another Saturday Night...

2007-01-06T18:55:00.000-08:00

...and I'm spending it watching playoffs and looking for jobs. Partaaaay! However, it is kind of a party because I love football and I'm actually finding jobs... for children's librarians... in the midwest... that pay more than $10 a year!!!! They are out there people! However, a lot of them are in the suburbs of Chicago. Now, I know that Illinois is a perfectly nice state with many positives. But the Wisconsinite in me (a very prominent part of me) is feeling a bit ill... However, they are well paying jobs and, really, who wouldn't love living in Gurnee!? (Is Gurnee considered a suburb?) I could start pronouncing it the way the locals do! And I could take everyone who visited me to the outlet mall and Great America! Fun!

I've also found quite a few kiddie positions in Indiana; however, most of those jobs are ridiculously poor paying. And what I've noticed and find rather interesting is that the jobs that pay about $20,000-$24,000 a year are the ones that list "sense of humor" as a job requirement. I'm having visions of myself wearing a snowman sweater (cause it's all I can afford!), dealing with bratty farm kids (oh the stereotypes I'm busting out right now!) and laughing at my misfortune because it's all I can do.

Okay, back to the job hunt and the playoffs (Dallas or Seattle?! Who will advance?!) I will leave you with this lovely job posting, courtesy of the Mishawaka Penn Harris Public Library:

Requirements: An MLS degree from an ALA-accredited library school or a college degree and at least six hours of graduate level library science courses.

Why didn't anyone tell me I only needed to take two classes in library school to get a job!?! :)

Karma is a Bitch.

2007-01-05T23:07:00.000-08:00

Argh, I've already screwed this up. I blame it on myself. I left my nice if not archaic livejournal blog, thinking that blogger would be a breeze! Well, I proved myself completely wrong and had to delete the blog (probably over-reacted... I have a tendency to do that) and now you're all probably somewhat confused. Well, I'm still here, at rosiekate.blogspot.com... but you might need to update your blogline feeds. Hell, I don't know. Let me know if it's all copasetic.

Okay, what was I talking about? Oh yes, I'm a horrible blogger. Before I start deleting my entire blog, I move you guys to this new unfamiliar blog and then I disappear. But, now I'm back (and so is the blog) and I have resolutions for you. I know you're all probably hopping up and down right now... it's very exciting. Anyway, now that it's 2007, exciting (and let's face it, terrifying) events are afoot and what better way to welcome it than with a list!?

1) Eat When I'm Hungry and Stop When I'm Not. This one is the big one. Part of me thinks I should just say "eat healthier foods and work out more" but I think I need to be a bit more harsh with myself and stop eating so frickin' much. I eat when I'm bored, I eat when I'm stressed, I eat when I'm with friends, I eat when I'm alone. And it's rare that I stop eating WHEN I'm full.

2) Find a Job. Holy shit. Terrifying. Part of me would like to dig a hole in my parents backyard and hide there forever. However, I'm not going to do that. Thus, I am going to whip my resume into shape, start believing that I'm going to be a great librarian and any library would be lucky to have me and start scouring for a job that pays more than $22,000 a year. I am librarian, hear me roar! :)

3) Accept Adulthood. I'm 24 years old and come May, I will have a masters in library studies and I'll be a real librarian. Hopefully at some point this year, I'll have a real job and my very own apartment. I don't want to make the same mistakes my parents made when they were my age. I want to be good about "paying myself" (i.e. taking money from my paycheck and saving/investing it) and I need to learn how to budget.

4) Stop Falling Down Stairs. Last week I fell down two flights of stairs. Granted, I was drunk the second time but it's getting ridiculous. My ass hurts.

5) Pack my lunch and stop eating make-shift meals from the vending machines at work. Nuf said.

6) Find a New Boy to Have a Crush On!!! Yes, I said crush. I'm okay not having a relationship at this point. That's very low on the priority list. However, I would just like to meet someone cute and nice and think "Huh, he is cute and nice and I like him." I'd be very happy if I just found that.

7) Be a Better Blogger. Blog more and oh yeah, stop fucking up my blog.

Well, that's about it.... that is unless I decide to delete this post and my entire blog again. Sigh.

Come Here Often?

2007-01-05T23:06:00.000-08:00

Hi there! And welcome to the new home of Katie's Adventures in Library Land. Personally, I expected a few more entries in livejournal land... perhaps one about the holiday season and a few funny tidbits that I've collected after hanging out at my parents' house for the last week or so (my mom is currently watching Dr. Phil. Gaaahhh.) However, one teeensy little thing has kept that from happening. And that is.... the "Bsafe" filter on my mother's internet.

Yes, my mother, a 61 year old woman, has a filter on her internet. This lovely filter helpfully blocks sites with "Inappropriate Content" and "R-Rated Humor" and "Web Email Personals" (it pops up these screens to help you understand why you can't read the latest on pink is the new blog). Since my mom only uses her high speed internet to check her email (i.e. email me obsessively), this whole filtering thing isn't a problem for her. However, when her smutty ass daughter (Hi that's me) comes home to use the internet, the filter becomes a slight issue (just a slight one.)

Case One: I am addicted to facebook. We're talking check it 10 times an hour addicted. However, according to my mother's family friendly internet provider, the website is not family friendly matter due to it's "personal" content.

Case Two (a very perplexing example): A few months ago, the website Overheard in New York (a very good way to waste time) was considered off limits due to its "offensive content and dialogue." Go Fug Yourself was still okay though. Now, just months later, Overheard in New York is considered a-okay and Go Fug Yourself is "R-rated humor." Out of both, I neeeeeed go fug yourself... I can't handle their indecision.

Case Three (why we find ourselves here rather than in livejournal land): It seems everyone these days is fed up with livejournal. First I turn on the poor thing and now the internet filter has joined in too. Now, I can read my livejournal but if I try to post to it, Bsafe says "Inappropriate News, Misc., Email." What? What the hell does that mean? However, Bsafe has deemed blogger a fine, worthy website. I can read all blogger blogs (even one that have curse words!), I can comment on all blogger blogs and I found out just minutes ago that I can even post to my blogger blog.

Thus, I have starting blogging in my new home a few days earlier than intended. I'm still working on layout stuff and I have no idea how to title this post but over the next few days I will try to figure it out. Hope you enjoy the new place :)

And as a side note: all of my archives will stay over at livejournal. The link is on my links page (the top of the list because I think sooo much of myself!) or click here to read them in all of their unhinged glory.